


Destiny and Dr. McCoy - Part One "One Man's Trash..."

by ChickSinger99



Series: Destiny and Dr. McCoy [1]
Category: Star Trek, Star Trek: Alternate Original Series (Movies), Star Trek: Enterprise
Genre: Aftermath of Torture, F/M, Gen, Medical Procedures, Mind Meld, Slow Build, Telepathy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-14
Updated: 2018-03-17
Packaged: 2019-03-31 11:29:40
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 8
Words: 28,263
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13974177
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ChickSinger99/pseuds/ChickSinger99
Summary: A story in three parts:By part three Dr. McCoy "gets the girl", but along the way he discovers things about himself and his destiny as he and the crew of the Enterprise unwittingly participate in the fulfillment of an ancient prophecy.





	1. Day 1

**Author's Note:**

> This story has been in the making for six years. I picked it up again after a three year hiatus right around the holidays, inspired to play around with it some more, and it fleshed out and exploded. Originally it was just for me, then I found out about this website. Loved Star Trek TOS - Dr. McCoy was my favorite and he never seemed to get his due. Then the movies gave us Dr. McCoy 2.0 and WOW! what an upgrade! Just wanted to do my part to give the good doctor a chance to see himself through other - fresh - eyes. So, yeah, we all know about the sucky ex-wife and the custody struggles and the guilt he feels about his part in his father's death. I'm not rehashing any of that. I'm hoping to reveal the brilliant doctor, the compassionate, deep, funny human being and the sexy man. Enjoy!

Day 1

09:30 -

The Enterprise has been enjoying a relatively uneventful few days since a close call on the last planet they encountered sent them here – into a previously uncharted section of space. Completely in accordance with their mission, if not the most exciting part of it, at least in their Captain’s point of view.

”Captain.”, Uhura announces. “I’m picking up an emergency dispatch.”

The seriously bored Captain Kirk perks up and thinks to himself, “Now that’s more like it.”

“Go on, Lieutenant.”, he says, as he gets up and walks over to her station.

“Well. Sir, it’s weak, but it seems, yes, it ** _is_** an appeal for assistance. It is from a planet called K-E-J-L. They are under attack. They are requesting help from anyone in the area.”

“What language is the transmission, Lieutenant?”

“Forgive me, Sir, that is what has taken so long. It seems to be a recorded loop in several languages, most of which I’m unfamiliar with. Currently I am unable to determine how long ago the transmission originated.”

“Did they include co-ordinates?”

“Yes, Sir.” She hands them to the Captain.

“This is Federation jurisdiction, if just barely. Set a course, Mr. Sulu.”, he says, passing the co-ordinates along. Then he pages Engineering, “Mr. Scott, give me everything you’ve got. We’ve got somewhere to go and no time to get there.”

“Aye, Sir.”

“Captain to Enterprise, brace yourselves for jump to warp drive. Kirk out.”

As soon as the ship is once again in stable flight Dr. McCoy appears on the bridge. “What’s up, Jim?”

“Distress call, Bones. We may be putting you and your people to work.”

“That’s not good news. Alright, I’ll put everyone on alert.”

Less than an hour later the Enterprise is in orbit around Kjel, but it is immediately evident that they are too late. Initial visual scans of the surface show no movement. The crew on the bridge is shocked and horrified as images continue to be transmitted. Anything that might have resembled civilization on the planet is now nothing but a smoking ruin. There is destruction everywhere, but no signs of life.

“Who would do this, and why?” Dr. McCoy asks the question on everyone’s mind.

“That’s an excellent question Bones, and one I would sure as hell love to answer. Looks like we won't be needing you after all. You can go tell your people to stand down.”

“Yes, Sir.”

“Mr. Spock, put together a ground team of our best forensic investigators and send them down to survey the area. See if they can find any evidence or clues as to who may have done this or why.”

The four don protective suits and gather in the transporter room. Once on the surface they fan out and move slowly toward the location co-ordinates they were given, scanning for signs of life. The team leader stays in communication with the bridge.

“Captain, it’s even worse up close. This must have been a town. None of the buildings appear to have been more than two levels high, but not one is left standing. The inhabitants were small, I’d say roughly 1.2 meters tall and the structures are proportionate to their size.

“Sir, it may sound silly, but this reminds me of a monster movie I saw as a kid. It looks like something big came through and knocked over or stepped on these buildings and just kicked or threw the inhabitants out of the way like they were rag dolls or something.”

“We’ve arrived at the location of the transmission. The wreckage here seems to be slightly more substantial. Perhaps it was a public building of some sort?”

The rest of his team is collecting, bagging and labeling anything that looks like it might be helpful while continuing to scan. “Whoa! Look at that!”, one of them suddenly exclaims.

“What is it?”, asks the Captain.

“Sir, I’m getting a faint life force reading where there wasn’t one before.”, the stunned crew member responds. “It’s coming from under a section of wall, but I know we scanned it before and there was nothing here.”

“Well, see if you can find out what it is, but be careful. It’s probably an animal and it may be trapped now.”

“Yes, Sir.”

As the crew removes the rubble where the reading is coming from they reveal a small space underneath the collapsed section of wall. Facing them is what looks like a twisted humanoid foot.

“Captain,”, the crew leader says somberly, “we’re going to need a medic.”

Kirk relays the message to Bones and he dispatches his best to the transporter room before returning to the bridge to be filled in.

The crew members hurriedly remove the rest of the rubble to reveal a woman who has miraculously been kept from being completely crushed by some of the larger pieces of rock.

Just then the medic arrives on scene and the other crew members clear him a path.

“What have we got, son?”, McCoy asks him from the bridge.

“Humanoid female, Sir. One point eight meters tall, roughly fifty-five kilograms. Obvious injuries are broken right foot, massive blood loss from forehead laceration and possible skull fracture. I’ve never seen blood like this before, Sir. It, well, it, you know the colors you see in an oil spill? It looks like that.”

He pauses and turns to the crew. “You, please collect some samples of her blood. You two, turn her onto her back, slowly and carefully, please.”

He continues to speak to Dr. McCoy. “Sir, the scan also shows three broken ribs. Her vitals are weak and seem to be dropping. I’m unable to adequately assess for internal injuries. One thing is clear, she won't last long if we leave her here. Captain, permission to beam her aboard?”

“Permission granted. Proceed with caution. She could be hostile.”

Then the shouting starts and the bridge hears, “She’s got a knife!” “Medic, sedate her, now!” “Help me hold her!” “Holy cow, look at her eyes!” Then everything goes quiet again.

“What just happened?”, Dr. McCoy demands.

“Sirs”, the crew leader replies, “She had a knife that we didn’t see. She opened her eyes, and when she saw us she tried to stab herself with it. It took two of us to restrain her until the sedative the medic gave her took effect.”

“Alright,” Kirk says, “you’re done there. Get Mr. Scott to beam you up. Dr. McCoy will meet you in the transport room with a trauma team. Bones, looks like you’re up after all.”

12:00 -

Within minutes they are back on board and a medical team consisting of Dr. McCoy, two nurses and another medic join the medic from the scene. The woman is surrounded and placed gently on a gurney. As they move through the ship she is i.d. scanned – part human, part unknown. Not helpful, Dr. McCoy thinks. A full body x-ray confirms the medic’s assessment, two broken bones in the right foot, two broken ribs on the right, one on the left, and a skull fracture under the laceration. It also reveals countless older fractures – mostly arm and leg bones - in various stages of healing.

“What the hell?”, the medic asks, when he show the results to Dr. McCoy.

Dr. McCoy shakes his head wearily. “Make sure all of it is documented, understood?”

The soft tissue scan amazingly reveals no internal injuries requiring immediate surgical attention, although the medic performing that scan draws Dr. McCoy’s attention to some results that don’t seem clear. Dr. McCoy knows what he is looking at but now is not the time. “Thank you. Not life threatening. We’ll discuss it later.”

“Yes, Sir.”

He looks again at the woman on the gurney. The exposed areas of her body are dirty, swollen and bruised. Her long, thick hair is a tangled, matted mess. “Now that we’re sure that our patient does not need immediate surgery, get her clothes cut off, clean her up and finish the examination.”, he orders.

As his team complies, he continues to focus on cleaning her head laceration. Suddenly exclamations of shock begin to break out all around him. “Good heavens! I’ve never seen anything like this.” “What made these marks?” “Those are ligature burns. She’s been bound. Repeatedly.” “These bruising patterns, she’s been beaten.” “Whipped, too, it appears.”

Dr. McCoy pauses and looks down the length of her now almost bare body. “Let’s turn her on her side.”, he says. “Gently, please.” As he supports her so she can be cleaned, he sees that the back of her body has suffered more abuse than her front. When they have finished cleaning both sides of her back he shakes his head and sighs. “You two,”, he says, pointing to the nurses, “finish cleaning her gently but completely. Get her catheterized, gowned and into an ICU biobed. Put an i.v. line in her left foot where she can’t impulsively remove it if she comes to. You,”, he gives an order to one of the medics, “when that’s done hang this antibiotic. I’m going to give the Captain a preliminary report.”

“Yes, Doctor.”

“Oh, Sir?”, one of the nurses asks.

“Yes?”

“What should we do about her hair?”

He looks again at the dirty tangled mess. “For now, just try to pile it on top of her head and wrap it so that it stays there. If she makes it through the night, we can think about washing it later.”

“Yes, Sir.”

“I’ll be back shortly to suture her head lac myself.” He turns away and then turns back. “I shouldn’t have to say this, but I’m going to because I saw the looks on your faces. Nothing you have seen leaves this room, do you all understand me?”

A chorus of “Yes, Sir.”s.

“You had damn well better mean that because if this unfortunate woman becomes the talk of this ship I will drum the lot of you out of Starfleet. And I can do it. Do I make myself clear?”

More “Yes, Sir.”s.

“Good.”

  
As he enters the bridge the Captain turns around and says, “Bones, what are you doing up here? Shouldn’t you be with your patient?”

“My team is getting her settled in ICU. I’m heading back to stitch her up. I just thought I’d give you an update.”

And give yourself a break, too, it looks like, Jim thinks, but decides not to comment on the haunted look in his friend’s eyes. “Well, come on, tell me in my quarters. I need coffee and it looks like you could use a cup, too.”

Once there Jim says, “Well, let’s have it.”

“Our sole survivor is in bad shape, Jim. Along with her fresh traumas it looks like she’s been used as a living punching bag for who knows how long and hadn’t finished healing from those injuries when this happened. Good luck getting her to talk. Her vocal chords have been severed – and not by anyone who has ever seen the inside of a medical school.”

“Good god.”, Jim breathes. “Okay, Bones. Go do what you can. Let me know if her condition changes or if she wakes up, alright?”

“Yeah. Thanks for the coffee.”

13:00 -

Dr. McCoy returns to Sickbay noting with satisfaction that his instructions have been carried out to the letter. Their passenger is settled in a secure biobed where every physical change or reaction can be closely monitored. He asks his head nurse to assemble a suture kit and join him. He wheels over a task light and administers a numbing agent. While they wait for it to take effect he scans the PADD that contains her chart. She is so still, yet her readings remain steady. Weak, but steady.

“Nurse, the only sedative she has received is the one the medic gave her on the planet’s surface, correct?”

“Yes, doctor, as far as I know. Why do you ask?”

“I’m just surprised that the effects haven’t begun to wear off. It must have something to do with the part of her physiology that we’re in the dark about. No computer or lab results back on her blood yet?”

“No, Sir.”

“Alright. Well, here we go.” Dr. McCoy begins to stitch her up. For some reason he finds himself using a subcuticular stitch to minimize scarring. He chides himself. She may not make it until tomorrow, and what’s one more scar on a body that has so many? Nevertheless, he did the first one that way and he has the time, so that’s how he’ll proceed.

On the third or fourth stitch, his nurse breaks him out of his silent reverie. “Doctor, the strangest thing is happening.”

“What is it nurse?”

“Look at her face. She appears to be coming around. But look at the biofunction scanners – her body temperature, respiration and heartrate are dropping!”

They study her quietly for a moment and sure enough she is trying to open her eyes. Just before she succeeds all her vitals drop to zero. The code alarm sounds and just as she seems to get them focused everything changes again. Her heartrate and blood pressure soar, her temperature shoots back up and her breathing becomes quick and shallow.

She is trembling as Dr. McCoy puts a gentle hand on her shoulder, meets her barely open eyes and speaks soothingly. “It’s okay. You’re okay. You’re safe. We’re going to help you.”

Her eyes attempt to focus on his as he speaks. When he stops speaking she shudders, closes her eyes and sinks into unconsciousness again.

They can only watch in wonder as her vitals recede to their original baseline levels.

“Well, I guess that explains how the ground team missed her initially. It appears she can mask detection when conscious. What other surprises do you have in store for us, kiddo?”

When he is finished stitching her up he gives orders that she be monitored closely and her vitals be checked hourly.

“Nurse, notify me immediately of any changes. Oh, and set the alarm code on that biobed for a ten second delay, please.”

“Yes, doctor.”

15:30 -

Hours later she begins to stir. Once more she tries to open her eyes and focus, but this time the nurse notices the signs and approaches her, causing her pulse and blood pressure to skyrocket. The presence of the medical staff around her gets her agitated, not sure where to look. Dr. McCoy notices this and gets up from the computer where he was seated. He approaches the foot of her bed. As he does so he softly but firmly orders everyone but one nurse to stop what they are doing and quietly leave the area, all while maintaining the eye contact with her that he somehow realizes is vital.

Sure enough, her eyes are locked on his and she is beginning to settle down a bit. He stops at the foot of the bed and studies her eyes for a moment. They are like nothing he has ever seen. Large, almond shaped, very exotic, fringed with dark lashes, but it’s the irises that take his breath away. They’re huge and iridescent, like her blood. Are they really moving, or is it a trick of the light? Her pupils are dilated now due to the dim light of the Sickbay, so it’s hard to tell. He realized this must have escaped his notice earlier because the bright task light he was using prevented her from getting her eyes completely open.

He begins to move again from the foot to the head of the bed, slowly and calmly, continuing to speak soothingly the entire time. Looking at her watch him he has a sudden flashback to his childhood. Finding a wounded kitten in the barn when he was ten years old. He had forgotten all about it until just now. He remembers that it was in as bad or worse shape than she is. It had watched him in the same way. Against all odds, he had managed to save that kitten, despite no one else agreeing that the effort was worth it. He’s going to do his best to save this one as well.  

 “Well, they weren’t kidding about your eyes, Kitten. I think I’ll call you that until we learn your name if that’s okay with you.”

He has no idea if she can understand a word he’s saying, but he continues to speak nonetheless, describing every move he makes as he conducts his examination. It is clear that she is frightened, but she is too weak to resist, and any evasive move causes fresh waves of pain.

When he has assessed her condition to his satisfaction he gives the nurse an order for some pain medication. When she returns with it he asks her to inform the Captain that their patient is conscious. He shows his patient the syringe and explains that he is going to add it to her i.v. He is hoping it will provide her some relief from the pain. He is gratified to see that it seems to do just that. She has stopped trembling as he takes a seat at the head of her bed. She seems to relax for a moment, but then her pulse-ox monitor drops and she begins struggling to breathe.

“Nurse! Oxygen mask! Now!”, Dr. McCoy barks as he unhooks tubing from the wall behind her and flips a switch. The nurse brings the mask and he motions her to the other side of the bed, all while deftly attaching the mask, adjusting the dial, meeting his patient’s panicked eyes and saying, “Hold on. This is going to help, I promise. Hold on.” But as he goes to put the mask on her face she closes her eyes and begins to thrash and struggle. “No, no, Kitten, relax. Don’t fight me.”

“Nurse, gently hold her right shoulder down, please.” And he gently presses her left shoulder to the mattress while holding the mask to her moving face with his other hand. “Look at me. Come on, look at me.”, he croons softly, trying to get her to open her eyes again and meet his once more. “Breathe. See? That’s better.”

After a few breaths her panic subsides as she realizes she can breathe again. She finally meets his eyes once more, searching them questioningly as she greedily sucks in the oxygen. The initial terror that he saw earlier when he or his staff approached her seems to have been replaced with something else. He just can’t quite put his finger on what it is. She is definitely trying to get some message across.

“You see?”, he tells her. “We just want to help you.” As he is about to glance up and check her O2 readings he realizes this would mean breaking eye contact. Why does that feel so important? It’s ridiculous. It reminds him of the game kids play on earth where they stare at each other to see who will blink first. But screw it, that’s why he has a nurse.

“Nurse, what are her O2 levels?”

“Excuse me, doctor?”

“Did I stutter?”, he says slowly, trying to keep the frustration off his face and out of his voice for the sake of his patient.

She gives him the current reading.

He continues to speak to her without shifting his gaze. “Thank you. This is what I want you to do. Remove your hand from her shoulder. Continue to watch her O2 readings. When they return to normal, inform me and then you are dismissed, understood?”

“Yes, doctor.” And she quietly complies.

They maintain eye contact until she is breathing easily again. “Alright, here’s what I’m going to do. I’m going to take your hand and let you hold the mask to your face.” And he does. She doesn’t resist or remove it. Good, he thinks. “Now, I’m going to stretch this strap behind your head to keep it on so you don’t have to hold it.” And before she can react, it’s done. “There. Now you can let go anytime you want to.” He demonstrates the motion on his own face, but she doesn’t move. She is focusing on him with every ounce of energy that she has as he talks to her. She is also struggling to keep her eyes open.

“Close your eyes and try to rest. I’ll be right over there.” He indicates a desk with a computer behind a partial wall. “I can keep an eye on you from there and I’ll be back if you need anything.”

16:30 -

Before long Captain Kirk and Mr. Spock arrive at Sickbay.

“Update, Dr. McCoy?”

“Captain, I’ve never seen or even read about anything like this. Her physical form is as close to human as we’ve ever seen. The external differences are subtle and only apparent with close observation. But there are some radical differences to her internal anatomy and physiology. Her blood chemistry is giving our equipment a run for its money. Our most basic human medications have extreme or unusual effects on her. The sedative my medic gave her, for example, kept her out for hours longer than it should have. The analgesic I just administered resulted in oxygen deprivation. I’m flying blind here. We know she has suffered massive blood loss and looks to be dehydrated and malnourished. When she is conscious she’s in a great deal of pain. I don’t even know how to list her condition – critical? Serious? Guarded?

“Will she last the night?”

“Sir, I have no way of knowing. I look at her and think anything could go south at any moment and that would be it because I would have no clue what to do about it.”

“Well, doctor, time is of the essence. As the only survivor she is our quickest and possibly only way of finding out who did this and why. We need information only she can provide and we need it now. Hell, we don’t even know for sure if she’s one of the good guys. We must consider the possibility that she may have been one of the aggressors. All we know is that she is the only non-native that we found on the planet. May we see her now?”

“Of course, Captain. I do recommend that you move slowly and speak softly.”

“Noted.”

As the three of them approach her bed she startles and struggles to focus. Dr. McCoy notices that it agitates her to visually keep track of too many people, so he steps to the side, out of her line of sight, happy for an opportunity to simply observe.

Captain Kirk takes the seat at the head of her bed and Mr. Spock stands beside him. Upon seeing Spock, her eyes register a momentary recognition, which she quickly tries to hide, but not before the Captain notices. As he introduces himself and then Spock she studies their faces intently. They try to cover their surprise upon getting a good look at her eyes for the first time.

They produce a white board and marker and demonstrate its use. They try to get her to write or draw something on it. She stares at them uncomprehendingly, making no move to take the offered pen. She closes her eyes. Whatever they want, it is plain to see she’s not interested.

“Do we know what language they spoke on that planet?”, the Captain asks.

“Yes, Sir. It was an obscure dialect. No one on board is familiar with it.”, Spock replies. “The S.O.S. that Lt. Uhura picked up was electronically generated – translated into multiple languages.”

Kirk studies her face for another moment then rises to go. This is getting them nowhere.

As Spock turns to follow, he places a hand on her lower leg, but winces and quickly removes it as her eyes fly open and she frowns.

Kirk, Spock and McCoy gather by the desk and confer.

“What do you make of this Mr. Spock?”, the Captain asks. “Can you tell whose side she was on?”

“Not with absolute certainty, Sir, no. However, she does not seem hostile. When I touched her, I sensed pain and fear, but no aggression. Also, she shared the clothing style of the inhabitants, did she not? That would suggest an association.”

McCoy adds, “Sir, what we do know is that she has been severely mistreated in ways that the most heinous criminals wouldn’t deserve. Maybe we ought to just let her rest and see if she even makes it through the night.”

“Doctor, you said yourself that may not happen. And she is alive now. As the only witness she has vital, time-sensitive information. Information that could possibly save lives and bring the criminals who did this to justice. I hate to propose this, but I only know of one way to obtain that information. Mr. Spock?”

“Mind meld?”

“I’m afraid so. Dr. McCoy, could she survive it?”

“Captain, you can’t be serious! You see how weak she is. As a doctor, my responsibility is to my patient. I strongly advise against it. Even if she could handle it, without knowing more about her race we don’t know what effect it could have on Mr. Spock.”

“With all due respect, doctor, as Captain, my first responsibility is to this ship and everyone on it. Besides the information she can provide us, I need to know if her presence puts us in jeopardy. Spock, are you willing to take the risk?”

“Of course, Captain.”

“Set it up, Dr. McCoy. Spock, I’ll be waiting for your report.” He leaves and the two of them look over at her.

“Spock, I don’t like this at all, but I have to obey orders. However, I won't restrain her. I don’t think it’s necessary and it would likely cause her to panic. I’m going to be there and the minute anything goes wrong I’m calling it off, understand?”

“Yes, doctor.”

As they return to her beside it is apparent that she knows something is up. They take positions on either side of the head of her bed, Dr. McCoy sitting, Mr. Spock standing. Her eyes are darting back and forth, and she is shaking.

“Spock, give me a minute, please.” McCoy asks. He takes her hand and begins to speak, gently explaining what is about to happen. “Look at me, Kitten. Try to relax. We’re not going to hurt you. We just need some information.” Her head is shaking no, but she keeps her eyes on his until he stops speaking and she feels Mr. Spock’s fingers on her face. Then she turns her gaze to him with a look of realization and determination, closes her eyes and becomes completely still.

Mr. Spock is dumbfounded to realize that she is employing a blocking technique of some sort. He places his other hand on her face and closes his eyes as well, trying harder. The effort begins to cause him pain.

She begins to communicate with him telepathically. _“Stop!” “Let go of me.” “I don’t want to hurt you.”_

But Spock tries even harder, amazed that anyone, especially someone in her condition, can resist him. Although the pain is evident on Spock’s face, the only sign that she is in any distress is when dangerous vital signs suddenly cause the biofunction scanners to start beeping. McCoy, who had been watching Spock, looks down at his patient to see that her pallor has changed to a deathly grey and there is blood dripping out of her nose. Then he remembers he had the alarms on the bed set to a – possibly precious – ten second delay. Medics are rushing to assist.

“Stop!”, McCoy shouts. He is on his feet. “Mr. Spock, I said stop! Now! That’s an order!”

Spock breaks contact and collapses to the floor. Medics help him to a bed and work to revive him.

Meanwhile Dr. McCoy returns his attention to his patient. Now what? He quickly studies her vitals, increases her oxygen flow, thankful she hasn’t removed her mask, and orders one medic to begin chest compressions to get her heart back into rhythm, and another to assist him. A portable head scan reveals several small blood vessels have ruptured around the site of her original injury. “She’s back in sinus rhythm, doctor.”, he hears. He assembles a team and moves her next door into the OR to stop the bleeding. Remarkably she makes it through the delicate endonasal surgery and is back in her ICU biobed hours later, no better, but no worse.

Captain Kirk is notified. His first concern is for Spock, who is recovering slowly. He is sedated now and resting.  Dr. McCoy leaves two nurses on duty, one for each patient, with orders to page him and the Captain immediately in the event of any change with either. Then with one last look at them both, he goes to get a meal and a shower.  

20:30 –

“No change?”, Dr. McCoy asks the nurse on duty as he approaches the bed of his newest patient.

“No, doctor.”

He touches her hand and shakes his head. “You are certainly making sure I earn my pay.” Then with a cursory glance at Spock who is still sleeping, and his nurse, who nods that he is fine, the doctor sits down at the computer once more to sift through the data they have procured so far.

That is where Jim finds him when he stops by on his way to bed to see Spock.

“Jim, I never should have allowed this. It’s a miracle it didn’t kill her, and it didn’t do Spock any good either.”

“Bones, I didn’t see any other option. I did what I thought was best. Are you making any progress?”

“Not really. It would sure help if I knew what I was looking for.”

“I know how you feel. I have been in contact with Command off and on all day, sending them all we’ve got, trying to get answers. All I can say is if it wasn’t on their radar before, it certainly is now. Spock sent word that he’s awake. Mind if I talk to him?”

“Go ahead, be my guest.” He turns back to the screen.

As soon as he sees Kirk, Spock begins to apologize for his failure to overcome her resistance. He tells the Captain that she is super-human, likely from beyond Federation boundaries. No race that he’s familiar with would be able to resist the mind meld in her condition.

“I need to connect with the ship’s database and do some research.”, he murmurs. “There is something that I am missing, something that I am forgetting.”

“It can wait, Spock. Get some sleep.”

“Captain, she communicated with me! She made it clear that she wanted me to stop. That she did not want to hurt me.”

“In what language?”

Spock looks confused. “The pain was so intense. I do not remember. It may have been Vulcan. It may not have been words at all.” He closes his eyes and sinks back.

The Captain tells him to rest and recover. They’ll talk again in the morning.

“Before I go, mind if I sit with your other patient for a minute?”, he asks Dr. McCoy.

“Look in on her if you like. She’s still unconscious. I don’t understand why. The anesthesia should have worn off hours ago. I’ll be out here if you need me.”

Kirk takes the seat next to her bed. She is motionless and pale, apparently comatose. He studies her face and begins to talk quietly - as much to himself as to her. He is a man of action. Sitting and waiting is not something he does well. And there she is with information locked inside her, information that can help him right this wrong, and possibly future wrongs as well – and it looks like she intends to literally take it to her grave. He apologizes for the mind meld and assures her that no attempt will be made to force her again.

His soft, deep voice somehow penetrates her consciousness. She opens her eyes weakly to meet his. They study each other in silence for a moment before her eyes close again and she is once more so still that he wonders if it even happened. He stands and says goodnight before leaving.

“Uh, hey Bones, I’m heading to bed. You ought to do the same. It’s been a long day.”

“Yeah, I won’t be far behind you.”

“Um, I think she just opened her eyes for a second.”

“Oh, yeah?!”, he jumps up and looks at the biofunction scanner but the readings haven’t moved. “Are you sure?”

“Well, those eyes are pretty hard to forget. And about that, I meant to say something about it earlier – a heads up in your update would have been nice.”

“Oh, yeah, that. Wait a minute! That’s on you! I planned to. You rushed me. As I recall, you were in a pretty big hurry.”

“Relax, Bones. It’s not a reprimand. Just took me by surprise, that’s all.”, he grins.

“Yeah, sorry. This one’s got me off my game. She comes in here looking like road kill, needing who knows what. Makes me feel so damn helpless. Then she fixes those – eyes – on me, like they’re some kind of lifeline. Earlier I got the weirdest feeling that she felt like I could heal her just by staring at her. How crazy is that!”

Jim chuckles. “We’ve seen crazier.”

Bones shakes his head and rubs his face with his hand.

“Look, Bones, give yourself a break. You’re doing what you know how to do and it’s making a difference. We haven’t lost her yet. Those fluids and medicines and stitches may not be everything she needs but they haven’t hurt. And she would have died without the surgery.” As the last words were coming out of his mouth, Jim realizes he should have quit while he was ahead. He can tell by the cloud that passes over his friend’s face that Bones is thinking, “Yeah, the surgery that wouldn’t have been necessary if you hadn’t ordered the mind meld.”

He clears his throat as he rises to leave and gives his friend a clap on the shoulder. “Goodnight, doctor. Get some sleep. That’s an order.”

Dr. McCoy dismisses the two nurses who have been on duty and requests another to come sit with his patients overnight. While he waits he checks on Spock. Then he takes the seat by the bed of their newest passenger. After recording her latest vitals he talks to her for a bit. He tells her how much he wants to help her and how he wishes he knew what to do. How sorry he is for everything she has apparently been through, because he doesn’t believe for a minute that she had anything to do with the things they saw. She briefly opens her eyes once more and holds his gaze for a second before closing them again.

Did she hear him? Did she understand?

He hears the door open as his nurse arrives. He stands and pats her hand. “Goodnight, Kitten. Get some rest.”

He instructs his nurse to record hourly vitals, make sure that the i.v. fluids don’t run out, and page him immediately in the event of any change with either patient.

 


	2. Day 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which we learn the backstory of our original non-human character.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter contains information necessary to the development of the story. The character has had it rough and wants to die. References to early rejection, loss of loved ones, mental and physical abuse. If these subjects upset you, please do not read. Thanks.

Day 2

06:00 –

Dr. McCoy wakes in his room surprised to find that his night was not interrupted. He resists the urge to rush to Sickbay, instead forcing himself to shower and shave. Breakfast is going to be a sandwich on the go however.

The night nurse fills him in. The evening has been uneventful. She turns over the logs. He thanks and dismisses her. The morning shift is due soon.

Mr. Spock is awake and asking to be discharged. Dr. McCoy tells him he can shower and eat breakfast. A fresh uniform will be brought for him, but he will have to be checked and officially released after that.

He moves to the bed of his other patient. He watches her for a while as he goes over her readings of the past night. It appears that she is attempting to regain consciousness.

Finally, he speaks. “Good morning, Kitten. Still with us, I see. That’s good. I just wish I knew who you were – what you were. You’re making it mighty hard for me to help you.”

As he talks he notices that her breathing becomes less labored and her heart rate slows a bit. Also, she is not making the wincing and flinching movements he had observed when he first arrived.

“Well, how about that.”, he says. “Something made you feel better. I sure would like to know what it was.”

As if in answer she opens her eyes and does her best to focus on his, but it’s too much and they close again.

“That’s alright.”, he says, patting her hand. “You just sleep. That’s a pretty universal prescription for healing.”

08:00 -

The Captain stops by on his way to the bridge. Spock has been checked and declared ready to be discharged and fit to resume his duties.

“So, Bones,”, Kirk says, “if your patient is awake I thought we might see if she understands Vulcan.”

“Wait here.”, he answers. “I’ll see.”

Wanting nothing more than to tell them both to go away and leave his patient alone, Dr. McCoy takes a quick peek, expecting to find her eyes closed. Well, he should have known – nothing with this one is the way he expects. Her eyes are fully open. He meets them for a moment but says nothing, just turns around and walks back over to the two men.

“She’s awake. You’ve got three minutes. I’ll be watching.”

They approach her bed and Captain Kirk once again introduces himself. Spock translates. She studies his face as he tells her – through Spock – that she is their guest. The medical staff will do everything they can to help her. She will be treated with civility for as long as she is on his ship. He apologizes again for the attempted mind meld. They are continuing to do their best to find and bring to justice those responsible for what happened on the planet where they found her. He expresses his hope that they can somehow find out who she is and where she belongs so that they can help her return home.

At this, tears begin to roll down her face. She shakes her head and turns away.

Dr. McCoy calls out to them, “Gentlemen, a word, please.”

She doesn’t acknowledge their goodbyes as they leave to join Dr. McCoy at the desk once more.

“Well, there’s your answer. She understands Vulcan. But may I suggest that going forward we read Dr. Baker in? I’m getting the sense that her emotional state may be even more fragile than her physical one. And, after all, isn’t this exactly the kind of thing Starfleet had in mind when they recommended adding actual trained psychologists to the long-term mission crews?”

“Agreed.”, Kirk says, and he and Mr. Spock leave for the bridge.

When they have gone, Dr. McCoy checks on his patient once more. She seems to have fallen back into a fitful sleep. He asks the nurse who has been assigned to monitor her to page him if she wakes up before he returns. Then he goes to see Dr. Baker in his office to bring him up to speed on their new passenger.

11:30 –

Dr. McCoy is informed that his patient has opened her eyes. She seems to be awake, though she has made no attempt to move or respond. He wraps up the food he has just ordered for lunch and heads back to Sickbay. He drops the food off in his office, washes his hands and heads to her bedside.

“Thank you, nurse.”, he says, as he takes the PADD and reviews her readings for the past few hours.

“Doctor, have you noticed the effect that you have on this patient?”

“What do you mean, nurse?”, he answers without looking up.

“I’ve taken the liberty of correlating her readings with the times you are physically present. Her breathing and heart rate are steadier and more even when she can see or hear you. Look, it’s happening now.”

“Huh! Well, that’s interesting.”, he says as he watches the biofunction scanners. “But let’s keep that between us, please.”

“Yes, Doctor.”

Then looking at the nurse again, “That’s not a request, by the way.”

“Understood, Doctor.”

“Thank you. You’re dismissed.”

He turns to see that he is being steadily regarded by those eyes. And as he meets them it occurs to him that it isn’t opals they remind him of, it’s nebulas! She literally has the stars in her eyes. 

Fortunately for him, he can think and talk at the same time, so, even as this is running through his brain he hears himself saying, “Hi there. Anything I can do for you?”

Stupid question, he thinks to himself, but, as if she understood, she weakly lifts a hand and points to the side of his head and then pulls her fingers and thumb up and together in a pinching motion.

“Sorry, Kitten.”, he frowns, shaking his head. “I suck at Charades.”

With the same hand she waves him closer. When he leans in she touches the top of his ear and then makes the pinching motion again.

“Spock!”, he says. “You want Mr. Spock!”

She nods and closes her eyes.

“Hold on, I’ll get him.”

Dr. McCoy pages Mr. Spock to Sickbay. Then he pages Dr. Baker to join them as well. Baker arrives first. He is a young man from the UK, fresh out of the Academy. He is followed closely by Spock and Captain Kirk who decided to join him. Dr. McCoy meets them at the door and explains how she let him know she wanted Mr. Spock.

The four men gather at the foot of her bed. This time she only acknowledges Mr. Spock. She seeks out his eyes and weakly lifts her hand. He approaches and takes it. Their fingers interlace. She begins to communicate with him via touch telepathy. “Can you hear me?”, she asks.

“Yes.”, he answers, surprised, and takes the seat by her bed, supporting her hand with both of his now.

“Please inform your Captain that his apology is accepted and let him know that he has nothing to fear. I pose no threat to his ship or anyone on it.” She is speaking fluent Vulcan.

Spock turns to the three men who have been observing silently and explains what is happening before translating her words for them. Her eyes are closed, and when he is finished, she continues.

“Please forgive me for the pain I caused you yesterday. If it is still your wish to access my mind I will not resist you. However, I must warn you that it will come with a cost, and I will be unable to protect you.”

Spock translates, and the men begin to ask him questions. He notices that she is losing strength quickly and suggests to the Captain that they let her rest and continue later. Realizing this, she grips his hand and begs him to allow her to finish.

“Please stop translating and just listen. When you have done what you need to do you will understand. Then you can explain everything to them.”

After translating this and getting the Captain’s approval Spock turns his full attention to hearing the rest of what she has to say.

“You may not be aware of this, but there is a long and deep alliance between our peoples, Mr. Spock. Based on this I have decided to entrust you with my memories. All of them. But I have one request. When the mind meld is complete, please help me die. It will soon become clear to you that I have no home, no family. I belong nowhere, especially not on this ship. You need to know that if I were capable of willing my own death I would have done so long ago. I need your help. All it will take is 2 cc of tricordrazine. It will make sense to Dr. McCoy. It will be quick, painless and peaceful for me. As a Vulcan, you will soon realize that this is the logical thing to do. These are my wishes. Please honor them.”

Tears have begun to form in the corners of her eyes, but she ignores them.

She opens her eyes to look at him before she continues. “This is my pact with you, Mr. Spock. What is in this for you, at the very least, is the information you need to identify and stop the criminals you are after. For me, it will be knowing that someone in the universe carries my truth and my death was not in vain. Just know, if you do this, it will cause you more pain, and for that I am truly and deeply sorry. Let it be the last time I cause pain. Make sure Dr. McCoy has lexorin on hand. I’m afraid you’ll need it. And quite possibly dimetra as well. That is all.”

They break contact and she closes her eyes again. Spock looks stunned.

McCoy breaks the silence, “Spill it, Spock!”

“Captain, I am willing to proceed with the mind meld. I believe what I am being led to understand is that her resistance yesterday was as much for my sake as for hers.”

“What? You mean she almost killed herself trying to protect you from something worse?”, Bones exclaims.

“Can you elaborate, Spock?”

“She apologized for the pain she caused me yesterday and warned me that if I decided to proceed today there would be more pain that she would not be able to, in her words, ‘protect me from’. Dr. McCoy, she requested that you have 2cc of tricordrazine standing by for her and she was very concerned that there was an adequate supply of lexorin and dimetra on hand for me.”

Dr. McCoy shakes his head as if to clear it. “What!? She knows Vulcan medicine? Who the hell is this woman? Don’t do this Spock. This is madness. This could kill you.”

“No, doctor, there can be very little risk of that or she would not have gone into such detail regarding my recovery. She was, however, adamant that I count the cost.”

“How the hell are you supposed to do that when you don’t know what this will do to you?”, McCoy sputters.

Kirk adds, “Spock, you don’t have to do this. We have other means of communicating with her now.”

“Sir, look at her.”

They all turn to regard her still form. Battered, bruised, swollen, scarred, eyes closed, barely clinging to life.

“She may not live long enough for other means. Doctor?”

He shakes his head. “Hell if I know.”

“These are her expressed wishes.” Addressing the Captain, “With your permission, Sir?”

“Alright, Spock. Bones, I’ll be on the bridge. Let me know if I’m needed. Come on Baker, let’s leave them to it.”

“Alright, Spock, overpreparation is adequate preparation.”, McCoy declares as he pages two medics and two nurses to join them in Sickbay. A bed is prepared for Mr. Spock with an i.v. pole and fluids standing by, as well as the requested medications. Only when every conceivable precaution has been taken does he ask Mr. Spock if he is ready to proceed.

“Yes, Doctor.”

Dr. McCoy sits by her side, taking her hand in his. He wills her to open her eyes, but they stay closed. She no longer acknowledges his presence.

Spock takes his place and puts his hands on her face. He closes his eyes. Clearly this time there is no resistance. About ten minutes pass. Suddenly Spock emits a long, loud cry – somewhere between a shriek and a howl. It is all he can do not to break contact as he begins to shake and rock. He is moaning and tears are falling. Shock, fear, pain, anger alternately pass across his face, but hers is the unchanging face of peaceful sleep – or death. Finally, Spock releases his grip with one last, loud cry and collapses. “Don’t give her the tricordrazine! It will kill her!” Then, “Don’t let her die. She’s Altan…”, he manages weakly before losing consciousness.

That’s when Dr. McCoy notices that her vitals have once again taken a nose dive. He instructs the team assigned to her not to give her any medications. She reacts to them in unpredictable ways. They can adjust her oxygen, give her chest compressions or even shock her if it becomes necessary to return her heart to normal rhythm. Just keep her alive. Spock said she was Altan. That’s something. Maybe he can find some information now about how to treat her.

Meanwhile the team assigned to Spock has managed to revive him and get him into a biobed. He is ashen and shocky, moaning and shaking his head. Then he becomes violently ill, vomiting and retching. An i.v. is started for fluids and his other medications are given. The contrast between the two patients could not be more extreme. One deathly still - vital signs barely registering, the other unable to control himself – moaning, rocking, shaking, retching, crying. Finally, after about an hour and massive doses of medication, collapsing exhausted into semi-consciousness, unable or unwilling to speak. The entire medical staff continues their duties in stunned silence.

Dr. McCoy is left to deliver the report to the Captain. One patient again comatose, his second in command incapacitated after an unprecedented show of emotion.

14:30 –

Captain Kirk comes to Spock’s bedside as soon as he can leave the bridge. When Spock becomes aware of his presence he forces himself to briefly open his eyes. They fill again with tears he can’t suppress. Kirk wants to comfort his friend but has no idea what to do. Another first. He looks down to the other bed in wonder. What the hell is going on?

He doesn’t have to wait long. Dr. McCoy comes over to check on Spock and puts something in his i.v. that seems to revive him a bit. He manages to get control of himself, though he is still pale and totally drained. His first question is for Dr. McCoy. “You didn’t give her the tricordrazine?”

“No, you told me not to. But I still wish I knew what I could give her.”

“Good!”, Spock breathes in relief. “It would have killed her.” There is so much Spock wants to tell Jim and Bones. Jim tells him to take his time, it doesn’t have to be this minute, but Spock is determined not to wait. They set up a recording device and Spock tells them the story of Zoe:

Her name is Zoe Grace. We will leave it at that for now, because her last name is hard to transliterate from her language. She is royalty, the daughter of the Altan king and an earthborn mother. Alta is a planet in a peaceful galaxy that has never had a need or desire to be affiliated with the Federation. They are in their golden age, advanced in intelligence and technology. Their life spans are well over 120 years.

Zoe’s father met and fell in love with her mother when she arrived on his planet not long after his wife of 40 years died giving birth to their sixth son. Zoe’s mother had become disillusioned with earth and had no plans to return, so when he asked her to be his queen, she agreed. It was a break with tradition, but she soon won the affection and loyalty of his people. Zoe was their first and only child. Surprisingly, her father never formed the affection for her that he had for her mother.

Zoe had the best education and training. She was curious and motivated as well as bright and talented, especially in languages and math. She seems to have preferred solitude and the outdoors to palace life, spending days at a time in nature. In her 14th year their planet was visited by a medical botanist from a nearby galaxy. He came seeking plant life with healing properties. He was welcomed by Zoe’s mother and tolerated by her father. He made frequent trips to the planet for about two years. Then he announced that his work was taking him to another star system and he would not be back again. But he and Zoe were in love. He asked permission to marry her and was denied. She appealed and was refused – told she would be disinherited and never allowed to return. She chose love.

They worked and traveled together for eight happy years, finally settling on a small Class M planet on the edge of Federation oversight with their two young sons. Its growing conditions were perfect for their work – raising and experimenting with the plant life they had collected. Their research and discoveries have been widely printed and published, but only under his name. I am certain there are some in our ship’s medical library, Dr. McCoy.

About seven or eight years ago a fierce race established a stronghold in the area. They are barbaric pirates who strike, take what they want and destroy what they don’t. They have stayed just outside Federation jurisdiction and control until recently. Their growing numbers have made them bolder. Somehow an organized group who was trying to thwart their attacks found out about Zoe’s skill with languages, codes and translations. They sought her help. She began to decipher transmissions for them. This continued until her work was discovered and she was tracked down.

“This is where it gets hard…

A warship landed on their planet without warning. She was forced to watch as first her two young sons and then her beloved husband were savagely and brutally killed.

At this point Spock stops and shudders as the visual memories return. He struggles to catch his breath.

The shock and sorrow almost drove her mad. She was informed that she was now their property. The last thing she saw as they took her was her entire existence burning to the ground. They left her planet looking much like the one where we found her.

These barbarians were crude and brutal, but not hard to fool. She doesn’t understand why they bothered to keep her alive except for the entertainment value they seemed to derive from her pain.

He pauses again, closing his eyes and shuddering.

“Take your time, Spock.”, Kirk says quietly.

As we have witnessed, Zoe is able to control her bodily systems, and can appear dead to the untrained eye. However, she does not have the ability to will herself to death, despite appearances and her own wishes. The barbarians had no understanding of her Altan physiology…

His voice breaks again. “The things they did to this woman…”

McCoy whispers, “Was she raped?”

“Technically, no. They are a large race. It would have been physically impossible. Also, they seem to have regarded her more as an animal than a female. But as I am sure you have seen from her scars, doctor, there is precious little of the surface of her body that was spared.

After particularly brutal sessions she would appear to die, in the hope they would discard and abandon her and she could escape. But there was nowhere to hide for long and nowhere to go. Eventually she would be discovered, and the cycle would begin again.

This continued for about four years. Early in her captivity she would sing to comfort herself. This infuriated her captives and when no amount of threats or torture made her stop, they severed her vocal chords.

He stops again to let the fulness of that memory pass.

By watching and waiting she finally managed to seize a chance to stow away on a supply ship. She slipped off unseen on the planet where we found her. Whether she was tracked there or there was already an attack planned, she does not know. She had been there less than a week when word of the impending attack arrived. She was the one who sent out the distress call.

“The rest you know. Once again, they thought they had killed her. Once again, they were wrong. This woman,”, looking down toward her bed, “has been treated worse than an animal for four long years. She has endured unspeakable tortures, both physical and mental. But her abilities are amazing. To say she has a mathematical mind does not begin to describe it. She can rapidly grasp most languages – possibly due to the most advanced pattern recognition I have ever encountered. Her fluency in Vulcan comes from an ancient historical connection that left my people indebted to hers.”

He pauses again. They all think about what they have heard.

“Captain, Doctor, as you can guess, she blames herself for the deaths of her husband and sons, as well as all those on the planet where we found her. Everyone she has loved or tried to help has been destroyed. Now she wants to die as well. We can’t let her. She knew what the mind meld would do to me and apologized to me for having to experience it. She asked me to take all of her mind on one condition – that I help her die in return. Perhaps that would have been kinder. But I couldn’t. We can’t. After what I have seen, I would give my own life for this woman.”

Dr. McCoy drops his head in his hands. Is this what all the eye contact has been about? Has she been silently begging him to put her out of her misery since they brought her aboard?

Kirk breaks the silence. “We understand, Spock. Take as much time as you need to recover, but I’m going to want a written report with as much detail as you can stand to include as soon as you’re up to it. Meanwhile I’ll send a report to Federation Command. We need to find and stop these animals. And perhaps I should send word to her home planet…”

“No!”, Spock says sharply. Then more evenly, “Forgive me, Captain.” 

“There’s no rush on that, is there Jim?”, McCoy asks. “If she pulls through, we can always ask her what she wants to do, but I’m with Spock on this one. My sense is she may not want them to know.”

“Okay, then. Well, at least you have somewhere to start now, doctor. Spock, let me know if you need anything.”

“Thank you, Sir.”

18:00 –

Shortly before suppertime Lt. Uhura stops by the Sickbay.

“Lieutenant. Can I help you?”

“Doctor, I’d like to see Mr. Spock. Is he allowed visitors?”

“Well, let me ask him how he feels about that. He’s not exactly himself at the moment.”

“So I hear.”, she says, trying to keep the edge out of her voice.

While Dr. McCoy goes over to talk to Spock, Uhura sees her chance to get a peek at the one responsible for his condition and takes it. She quietly approaches Zoe’s bed and is so intent on studying her that she doesn’t hear Dr. McCoy return until he is right behind her.

“Lieutenant!”, he barks.

“Sir!”, she jumps, biting back an expletive.

Dr. McCoy mentally berates himself for shouting so close to a patient, but a quick glance reveals that it didn't even register. He finds himself sighing disappointedly before returning his glare to Uhura. “Over there! Now!”, he whispers forcefully, pointing to the desk.

“Yes, Sir.”

When they are out of earshot he asks her, “Just what the hell were you doing?”

“I just wanted a look at the woman that Spock said he would die for.”, she says. "I don't get it."

McCoy can feel his blood begin to boil. Damn that Jim. Why can’t he keep his mouth shut? They’re going to have a talk. Tonight! Hopefully he at least had the sense to confine his comments to his senior officers.

“Lt. Uhura, I would strongly advise you to withhold judgement until you know what you're talking about.”, he says coolly. “Now get out of my Sickbay.”

“But what about…”

“Out!”

McCoy doesn’t bother to tell Uhura that his instinct was right. Zoe’s memories were too fresh in Spock’s mind for him to want to be around anyone while he tried to document them. Before leaving for dinner he calls in a nurse and leaves strict instructions that no visitors are to be allowed to see either patient, and if anyone tries he is to be paged immediately. Then he goes to have it out with Jim about his big mouth.

19:30 –

Jim has left the bridge for his cabin. That’s where Bones finds him after stopping at his own quarters first to shower and change, which he finds necessary after Spock’s revelations.

“So, Lt. Uhura stopped by Sickbay earlier.”

“Oh?”

“Yes, ‘oh’. Something about wanting a look at the woman her man would die for.”

“She said that? Oops.” Jim looks sheepish.

“If there’s no drama you just have to create it, don’t you?”

“Why, Bones, whatever do you mean? I didn’t go into any detail. I was just bringing my senior staff up to speed on the latest developments with our passenger, especially as it concerns their currently incapacitated first officer.”

“Don’t you think Zoe’s got it hard enough without predisposing people not to like her?”

“Zoe? Oh, it’s Zoe, now? First name basis? Not, ‘our passenger’, or ‘my patient’?”

“Damn it, Jim! Don’t you dare turn this around!”

“One of the nurses even told me you have a nickname for her. Let me see. ‘Kitten’, I think it was?”

“What the hell is wrong with you, man?”

Jim is laughing now. “God, you’re so easy. Thank you, Doctor. You’re always good for a laugh. You should see your face. It’s eight shades of red.”

And suddenly, like a balloon that’s been popped, Bones is laughing, too. “Oh crap. I guess I have been pretty tightly wound the past couple of days.”

“You think? Damn, Bones, after hearing a story like that if you don’t laugh you’re going to cry – or worse. I’m willing to bet you haven’t eaten. Let’s get some supper.”

21:30 –

After supper Kirk returns with Bones to Sickbay before retiring for the night. They are informed that there has been no change in Zoe’s condition. She continues to hover in limbo.

They check in on Spock who is recovering a few beds over. Little by little he has tried to write the full story, but finally has had to give up and just rest. He is sleeping now.

Dr. McCoy goes back to the computer to see what he can find out about Alta and its inhabitants.

Kirk decides to sit with Zoe for a little bit. He takes her hand and strokes it. He begins to quietly pour his heart out to her.

”Zoe Grace, can you hear me? How long has it been since you heard the sound of your name? I know you can’t think of a single reason to continue living right now, but I assure you, there are plenty. There’s a lot of good that you can still do. I know you feel like you’ve done enough, but you’re not a quitter, you’re a fighter. You’ve proven that time and again. I want you to fight now. Do it for me? I want a chance to know you.”

Once again his deep, soft voice reaches to the depths of her consciousness. He keeps talking, telling her that the things that happened to her were horrible and wrong. She has been forced to live unable to acknowledge that to anyone, but no more. She is free now, she is safe. She can grieve.

As he continues to speak, tears form in the corners of her closed eyes. At first that is the only sign that she has any awareness. Then an odd phenomenon occurs that shocks and startles him and gets the whole place in an uproar. Her back arches and her mouth opens wide and an unearthly loud screaming howl is heard – but not from her, from Spock. She is sitting bolt upright now, tears streaming down her face, eyes shut tightly, continuing to silently scream.

“NO!” Spock is giving voice to her pain. “NO!”, “WHY?”, “This is too much to bear!” “Do something!”

Her arms are bent and her hands are fisted as her body doubles over, convulsing with sobs.

“Help her! Sedate her!” Spock continues.

Dr. McCoy, who had jumped up and rushed in at the sound of the first scream, has already ordered one nurse to sedate Mr. Spock and another to page Dr. Baker to Sickbay STAT, and is attempting to make sense of the situation. He goes to the head of Zoe’s bed next to the seat the Captain sprang up from.

“Zoe?”, he says softly.

Her eyes open briefly and find his before closing again. She is shaking, her mouth is still open and the tears are falling freely. It is obvious she is in agony.

“Yes, yes.”, he croons softly, as he takes her shaking body in his arms and holds her, gently rocking her. “Let it out, let it all out. It hurts so much. I know.”

Her eyes open again and this time they lock on his. She grabs him tightly with both fists. She is clutching him and shaking her head in what appears to be anger and unbelief.

Dr. McCoy tries to get her to lie back, but she is clinging to him, still shaking her head and crying.

Spock calls out drowsily, “She is angry that she is still alive. She is furious with me that I broke our agreement.”

Dr. Baker has arrived and has been observing. He orders the nurse to administer a mild sedative. Before she does she checks with Dr. McCoy, who nods. As it takes effect Zoe relaxes a bit in Dr. McCoy’s arms, but she won’t release him. She is pleading with him with her eyes, trying to get him to understand something.

“Yes, yes. I’m right here, Kitten. I know. I know it hurts so much. I won't leave you, okay?” And then her eyes close and her head drops back and she releases him. He sits beside her on the bed.

“Bring me a cool, damp cloth, please.”, he softly orders the nurse. When she does, he begins to sponge her forehead and neck with the cloth, all the while continuing to whisper, “It’s okay. Everything is going to be alright. Try to relax. That’s it. That’s good…”

“What did I do?”, Kirk asks softly, watching in dismay.

“It appears you lanced a boil,”, Dr. Baker answers, “so to speak. She is finally releasing some of that pent-up poison.”

“Is she going to be okay?” He looks to Dr. Baker for reassurance.

“That remains to be seen.”

Dr. McCoy looks at the Captain and shakes his head. “Do me a favor, the next time you decide to perform surgery without an anesthetic, let me know first, okay? So I can stop you!” He returns his attention to Zoe who is still crying softly and breathing heavily. ”That’s it. Let it out. You have every right to be sad, to be angry…”

He turns back to the Captain who hasn’t been able to move or take his eyes off her face. “You can go to bed now. I’ll stay with her through the night.”

“Bring me a chair. I’m not leaving.”

“Don’t be ridiculous. There’s nothing you can do. And there’s no sense in neither of us sleeping. You have hundreds of people on this ship to think about. Right now these are my only two patients. Let me handle this.”

“I can’t leave her like this, Bones. I caused this. I need to stay.”

Another chair is brought and put on the other side of her bed. The nurse returns with a fresh cool cloth. Dr. McCoy motions for her to give it to the Captain who takes over trying to comfort her. Then he gets up and goes to consult with Dr. Baker.

Dr. Baker suggests a medication that may cause temporary amnesia and allow her to sleep. They decide to try it – at half strength to start with. Dr. McCoy’s concern is that her convulsions may have aggravated her injuries. He wants to perform a scan. They administer the medication first and observe her closely for adverse side effects. Her tears slowly stop and she drifts off to sleep. The scan is quickly performed and reveals no issues. Baker leaves, telling Bones he’ll be back in the morning.

Kirk holds Zoe’s hand and watches her sleep until he can’t stay awake any longer. Dr. McCoy checks both of his patients one last time before settling into a chair on the other side of Zoe and dozing off himself.

Sometime during the night she startles and wakes up, trying to sit up in bed, shaking and disoriented. This wakes Dr. McCoy who tries to get her to focus on him. “Zoe, lie back. Look at me. It’s just a nightmare. You’re safe.”

Mr. Spock is awake now as well. He calls out that Zoe is overcome with panic, not knowing who she is or where she belongs.

Kirk has awakened to hear all this. He, too, tries to get her to look at him, but she keeps her eyes shut. “Listen to me. We are going to help you figure that out. You are not alone anymore. Do you understand?”

She sighs, curls up in a ball on her side and drifts off again. Dr. McCoy decides to take advantage of this position to change the bandages on her back. To his surprise her wounds are already closed and healing nicely. Amazing.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> To anyone who found this and lost it - forgive me, I am new to this.  
> I think I have it figured out now, so the rest of the story should be uploaded correctly.  
> (Does anyone know the coding to get italics and underlining into my text?)  
> Thanks :)


	3. Day 3

Day 3

06:00 –

The nurse on duty arrives to wake Dr. McCoy. Zoe is still asleep, her vital signs are not what he’d like to see, but they are better than they’ve been so far. He wakes the Captain and the two of them slip quietly from her bedside. They go into his office and get coffee.

“What now?”, Kirk asks.

“Physically it’s hard to say. I changed her bandages while she slept last night. Jim, it’s only been, what, 40 hours since we brought her on board? She’s healing faster than any species I’ve ever seen or heard of. I mean, come on, if I were a betting man, I would have bet against her living through the first night.”

“Yeah, if you could have found anyone to take that bet.”

“Exactly! So, hell, the fact that she’s still hanging on – now I’d bet that she could make a full recovery, unless there’s anything specific to her Altan physiology that I’ve missed. I’ll go back to researching that today. It’s anyone’s guess how long it might take for her to get her strength and stamina back. I imagine she’ll be weak for quite a while. She’s malnourished, but that should be easy to fix. Emotionally, psychologically, it’s harder to say. Her mind is amazingly strong considering what she’s been through. I’m glad we’ve got Baker on board – he may be young but he has an excellent reputation already. Kind of tough he drew this for his first mission, though.”

“Don’t weep for Baker.”, Jim chuckles. “His first passion is xenoanthropology. He’ll probably get a book out of this. Or at least a chapter.”

“Alright, see, that right there is what concerns me. If Zoe does make it, the last thing I want – we want – is to make her feel like she’s some science project.”

“No, I hear you, Bones. You’re right. I’ve got to shower and get to the bridge. You’ll keep me updated?”

“Of course.”

As the Captain is leaving Dr. Baker arrives to see how Zoe made it through the rest of the night. Dr. McCoy fills him in and after they talk for a few minutes they walk over to her bed to find her stirring.

“Good morning, Zoe. Are you awake?”, Dr. McCoy asks.

She opens her eyes at the sound of his voice. They find his and search them with 100 unasked questions as the tears begin to fall again. As he approaches the head of her bed she struggles to sit up.

“Wait, let me help.”, he says softly as he sits on the side of the bed and lifts her into his arms. She embraces him and buries her head in his chest, crying softly. He rocks her and strokes her back. “Hey, it’s okay. I’ve got you, Zoe. We’re going to help you.” The tears stop, but she continues to hold onto Dr. McCoy.

Meanwhile Dr. Baker has been watching the monitors and is stunned. She has been getting stronger by the minute. “Doctor, do you see what’s happening?”, he says, indicating the biofunction scanners.

McCoy looks up. “It’s called practicing the healing arts. How quickly we forget that touch can be therapeutic.”, he says softly.

Baker studies the scans for a moment before commenting quietly, “I’m sure you’re right, but somehow I think it’s more than that.”

Zoe has relaxed her grip so Dr. McCoy lowers her back down. “Zoe, can you understand what I say to you?”

She holds up a thumb and forefinger.

“A little bit?”

She nods assent.

“Where do you hurt?”

She makes a fist and weakly pounds her chest.

“Your heart?”

Nod.

“Yes, I know, Kitten. I understand. But what about your body? On a scale of one to ten” – he mimes – “one being no pain,” holding up one finger and smiles, “ten being the worst pain?” He holds up both hands and grimaces.

She holds her head in both hands and looks at him before holding up seven, no six, no seven. She shakes her head and he knows she doesn’t just mean physical pain. Then she touches her ribcage on both sides and decides on three. Finally, she rotates her right foot then flexes it before holding up two fingers.

“Okay. Good to know. We can help you. You’ve got a lot of healing to do. This is Dr. Baker. He is going to help you with your heart.” He mimics her motion. “He knows how to help people who have been hurt the way you have. People who have been treated badly.”

She studies Dr. Baker for the first time.

“Will you trust us to do what’s best for you?”

She looks confused and frowns.

“Too much to ask? That’s okay. We’ll be back in a minute.”

They leave the room to discuss how to treat her. They decide that the best course of action is to keep her as pain free as possible, while still awake enough to interact and perhaps begin to eat or at least drink a little something to get her body fully functioning.

Dr. Baker has been thinking about what he has observed. “Dr. McCoy, it appears to me that she has bonded with you on some level. I saw it last night, and then again just now. You are our best chance at reaching her. Continue to reassure her that she is among friends. It won’t be easy, given her history, but perhaps her advanced intelligence will work in our favor.

As they return to her bedside, Zoe becomes agitated at the sight of a large syringe, but as soon as Dr. McCoy realizes this, he indicates that it is to go in her i.v. and she settles down a bit. The drug has an immediate effect and she relaxes and closes her eyes.

“That’s right. Rest now. I’ll look in on you again in a little while.”

They leave. Dr. Baker tells Dr. McCoy that he will check back that afternoon to see her unless anything occurs that requires his presence sooner than that.

08:00 –

Mr. Spock is checked again and declared ready to be released but he is advised to pace himself. He asks if he can spend a moment with Zoe before he goes back on duty. Dr. McCoy gives the okay and Spock approaches and quietly stands by her bedside. She senses his presence and opens her eyes.

He speaks in Vulcan, “Your humble servant, Your Majesty.”

She studies him for a long moment before stretching out her hand. He takes it in his, their fingers interlace, and they continue their communication telepathically. After a few minutes she closes her eyes and he releases her hand, bows and leaves.

Dr. McCoy has been observing and asks Spock what just happened. Spock informs him that their peoples have a history that long ago allied the two races. The Vulcans owe a great debt to the Altans. He was acknowledging that debt, but she would have none of it. In her eyes, they had an agreement and he broke it. As an Altan, she finds that incomprehensible, especially after sharing the full experience of her memories. He informed her that just as she was half human and half Altan, he was half human and half Vulcan. Though logically it could be argued that aiding her death could be viewed as humane since it would eliminate her suffering, taking life was against everything he stood for and believed in. He offered to erase her memories, but she insisted that she would rather die with them than live without them.

Dr. McCoy insists that Spock make an appointment with Dr. Baker for himself. This suggestion is met with resistance at first, but Spock is soon helped to see the logic of it and agrees.

10:00 –

When Dr. McCoy returns to Zoe’s bedside he is gratified to see that, although she initially tenses at hearing his approach, she relaxes a bit when she realizes who he is. He has brought her a warm drink and he elevates the head of her bed a bit to make it easier for her to sip it. He sits in the chair next to her bed and allows her to take her time. As she sips he talks to her about the ship and the crew, noticing that she is concentrating on every word and rapidly increasing in understanding. He can also see that the totality of her focus quickly drains her. As she starts to fade he takes the cup and stops speaking, allowing her to doze off before lowering the bed again and leaving her side. He wonders how long it has been since she has had anything nourishing to eat.

Perhaps it is the effect of the warm liquid filling her belly, but it is several hours before Zoe stirs again. Dr. McCoy has allowed her to sleep uninterrupted. He has had his staff steer clear, recording her hourly readings himself. Now, seeing that she is wakeful again, he takes her chart and approaches her bed. This time he senses no apprehension or suspicion.

He makes note of her current readings, pleased with what he sees. He continues his practice of narrating what he is doing and why, still unsure of how much she understands. One thing is clear, when he does this, she focuses so closely on his speech that she forgets to be afraid or resist.

He double checks her temperature with the back of his hand to her forehead, then picks up her hand to check her pulse at the wrist, not because he needs to, but to subtly reacclimate her to non-threatening physical contact.

The only sign of discomfort she shows is when he shines a light in her eyes to check that her pupils are still equal and reactive. To his great relief they are, but he realizes that they have been the last several times he has checked. That’s when he has to admit to himself that this time it’s for him, as the memory of the day before, just before the mind meld, comes rushing back. Only 24 hours ago when she refused to open her eyes and he thought he had seen them for the last time. Now he does it just to enjoy up close the light show that is her irises. “Snap out of it, man! You’re a doctor!”, he silently chides himself.

He is a little ashamed of himself, but when he meets her eyes again he sees no reason to be. She continues to regard him openly and levelly. No questioning, no discomfort, no accusation in her expression, simply acceptance, as if everything he does is the most natural thing in the world. “Watch yourself, man. Do not give her a reason to doubt you.”, he thinks.

He calls a nurse over to draw some blood. Seeing her distress at this he tries to distract her by removing her bandage to examine her head wound. He tells her how visibly startled he is by how rapidly it is healing. She tries to pay attention but doesn’t relax again until the nurse is gone.

His examination complete, he takes a moment to sit in the chair beside her bed. “Zoe, I’m a doctor. I’m your doctor. Do you know what that means?”

She studies his face, trying to understand.

“It means that my job is to help you get well. I want to do everything I can to help you heal and get strong again.”

She continues to study him intently.

He asks her to try to sit up, demonstrating the movement. She struggles, and with his help barely manages it. The effort causes her heart to race and her head to spin. He sees this and lowers her back down.

“Okay, you may be healing rapidly, but you are still very weak. I’m doing some research, trying to find out how to help you. You can trust me. Do you know that?”

She sighs and knits her brow.

“I have an idea.”, he says with a sudden smile. “I think I know something we can do that will make you feel better. I’ll be right back.”

He returns in a few minutes with a nurse and a gurney.

“I’m going to lift you up and put you on this gurney, okay?”, he asks as he demonstrates the motion.

She nods slightly, but her eyes never leave his as he does what he said he would do.

They wheel her around the corner into a room with a sink.

Dr. McCoy stands by her head. “Zoe, I want you to relax. I’m going to be very gentle with you, I promise. I’m going to slide you back on the gurney a bit so that we can free your hair. Then we’re going it wash it, okay?”

She shakes her head and starts to hyperventilate.

“Nurse, get me the oxygen mask!”

He puts it on her face. “Zoe, remember this? Just breathe, okay?”

She does as instructed and begins to relax a bit, but it is evident that something is troubling her.

As he is making sure she is getting enough oxygen, the nurse removes the wrap, covered in dirt and blood, and discards it. Then she pulls up a stool and begins to gently brush through the tangled mess on one side. Dr. McCoy rolls back to join her and takes the other side. As they attempt to remove the looser bits first, he says softly, “This might take a while.” Then something makes him feel uneasy.

“Nurse, something isn’t right.”, he says. They stop. Zoe is completely still. He rolls his stool around to see if she is awake. Well, this is new. “Nurse?” His nurse joins him. Zoe is awake alright, but her eyes are as big as saucers and she is biting her lip – hard. She is willing herself not to move, to hardly even breathe, her eyes are focused on some distant point. He can’t get her to respond to his voice or his touch and for the first time she won't meet his eyes.

They roll their stools back behind her head again. Dr. McCoy asks, “Nurse, what do you make of that?”

“Well, doctor, since you asked,”, she says, truly surprised that he is deferring to anyone else in the care of this patient, especially a nurse, “perhaps in her culture handling a woman’s hair is an intimate act?”

“Well, she’s too weak to do it herself. Let’s just try to get it done as quickly as we can, shall we?”

And so much for that, she thinks. But perhaps it’s worth another shot. “Doctor, may I try something first?”

“Alright but make it quick.”

The nurse stands up and is surprised when Zoe immediately meets her eyes. “Zoe, would it be alright if I washed your hair?”, she asks, pantomiming the gesture.

There is no mistaking the affirmative nod or the sigh of relief.

Dr. McCoy gets up and says, “Well, you’re going to need some help. I’ll send someone in to replace me.”

Zoe reaches out for him as he is walking out but misses.

“Doctor?”, the nurse calls, and nods towards Zoe.

He sees Zoe holding her arm out to him. Glancing over at the nurse, he notices that she seems fully absorbed with combing out Zoe’s hair once more. He walks back to the gurney, takes Zoe’s hand and places it back by her side. She meets his eyes and mouths “Thank you.” That’s when he sees that she has bitten her lip hard enough to draw blood. He fights the urge to brush her lips with his thumb, suddenly wanting nothing more than to feel them under his fingers. He gives his head a little shake to clear it and pats her on the shoulder instead. “Of course.”, he says smiling at her, and leaves the room.

It takes over an hour for the two nurses to comb out, rinse, shampoo, and then rinse Zoe’s hair again. They check her from time to time. They can’t be sure, but if she isn’t enjoying their ministrations, she seems to have no complaints. With each final rinse her hair becomes fuller and more alive in their hands, revealing more depth and shade of color. Like her eyes and her blood, her hair is also iridescent, the colors not easy to identify. Even as they rinse, a section that looked auburn will appear chocolate with gold flecks, or burnt sienna with purple flecks, or a myriad of other possibilities. 

When they are done carefully drying it, they slide her back down on the gurney so that her head is once again supported. Her hair is hanging off the end of the gurney like a glossy waterfall, almost touching the floor. The first nurse comes to get Dr. McCoy. “You need to see this, doctor.”, she says.

He can’t believe what he sees. “Where was all this hair?”, he asks. They just shake their heads. “And, Doctor, you have to feel it! We’ve never felt human hair so soft.”, she says as she holds out a section toward him.

He looks at Zoe, his eyes asking permission. She nods and holds very still. She starts to bite her lip but stops herself and simply closes her eyes instead. He takes the briefest stroke of the offered end, and then just one more. “Wow.”, he looks at them in agreement. “Please put it back on top of her head again to keep it out of her way.”, he says. “And thank you, Nurse.”

14:00 –

The nurses return Zoe to her bed and get her settled again. Dr. McCoy allows them to bring her more warm liquid nourishment. The day’s events have shown him that he needs to allow others to share in her care as long as she is willing.

Dr. Baker stops by hoping to talk to her, but she is fast asleep. The two men talk for a while in Dr. McCoy’s office. He wants to fill the younger man in on the things he has learned about Zoe. They ask to be notified when she wakes up, but she stays unconscious for the rest of the afternoon. They decide to try again tomorrow.

He stays late in Sickbay that evening, continuing to search for anything and everything that might enlighten him about her medically. It frustrates him to find virtually nothing about Alta or its people. His stomach tells him that he has worked through suppertime. Things must be going smoothly. Nice change.

He allows himself to look in on Zoe one more time that day, just before leaving. The nurse attending her tells him that she has been awake off and on but has not tried to communicate. She hasn’t tried to ask for food or water but will sip a little of what they bring her. Her pain levels seem to be lessening, without any spiking. The rest of her readings are still weak but steady. She is asleep now. He thanks the nurse, asks her to page him if he’s needed, otherwise he’ll be back in the morning.


	4. Day 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> To my readers - thanks for hanging in there through all the serious stuff. We get a little humor in this chapter - finally :)  
> Enjoy!

Day 4

07:00 –

Another crisis free night. Dr. McCoy resists the urge to rush to Sickbay, opting instead for breakfast in the Officer’s Mess.

He is glad to see Spock looking normal again, well, normal for Spock. Jim is voicing frustration at the hoops he is having to jump through in order to obtain assistance and co-operation in tracking down Zoe’s abductors. Bones is suddenly paged to Sickbay.

“What’s the emergency, nurse?”, he asks with concern in his voice, already on his feet.

“Just an accident in Engineering, Sir, but it needs your attention.”

“On my way.”

Arriving he finds the relative peace of the last couple of days has been shattered. Two red shirts are in his Sickbay, both needing stitches.

“Accident?”, he scowls. “Are these two injuries somehow connected?”

“No, Sir.”, both men reply simultaneously. “Well, yeah, I guess.”, says one. Just one of those crazy things when you’re passing a sharp tool to someone and they drop it and you both try to grab it at the same time.”, one continues.

“Oh, sure. Happens in the O.R. all the time.”, Bones mutters.

“See!”, he tells his friend, apparently justified.

“No, you imbecile!”, McCoy shouts. “You are Starfleet engineers, not adolescents. I don’t even want to know what had you two distracted enough to let this happen, but don’t let it happen again, do you hear me?”

As he is reaming them out he notices that their eyes have been roaming the Sickbay the entire time. He steals a glance to the area where Zoe’s bed is and is pleased to see that one of his nurses has had the sense to pull the privacy curtain.

“Am I boring you boys?”

“No, Sir!”

“Looking for something then?”

“Are we the only ones in here?”

“Why, did you lose somebody?” He has finished treating the first young man and has moved on to the second.

“No, Sir. It’s just…”

“Forget it. There’s nothing to see here. Nurse, give them both an antibiotic before they leave. I’ll send a report to Mr. Scott. I imagine it will reach him before you do. The next time I see either of you two in here it had better be for a scheduled physical. I hope it was worth it, gentlemen.”

When they are gone he takes a minute to check in on Zoe. She is awake, so he says good morning, and asks her how her night was, just making conversation, while going over her records from the previous night.

“Well, you’re not going backwards, that’s something, I guess.”, he says. “Less pain today?”

She nods.

“Still tired, though?”

Another nod.

“Not surprising. Your body suffered a great deal of trauma. Then the surgery and the mind meld on top of that. But it doesn’t look like you slept much last night. I can tell from these, they record REM sleep.” He looks at her. “Why didn’t you let the nurse know you needed something?”

She just looks at him, as if he should know. And damned if he doesn’t think he does.

“Hmm. We have to find you a way to communicate more clearly.”

While he is saying this and thinking about it, they begin to hear activity out in the main area of Sickbay. Activity that gets progressively louder.

“What the devil?” He sticks his head out from around the curtain. “Nurse, what’s going on out there?”

“Nothing we can’t handle, Sir. A sore throat, a headache, a stomachache, a rash, a slip and fall, and a paper cut.”

“A paper cut!” He takes a deep breath, turns to Zoe and says, “Excuse me.”, and walks out into the center of the Sickbay. Just as he expected, this is the first assignment for each of the crew members waiting to be seen. I’m nipping this in the bud right now, he thinks. He looks at the nurses and says, “I’ve got this.”

Turning his attention to the group in front of him, he continues, “I am going to say this once, so listen up, because I should not have to be saying it at all. You are supposed to be the best of the best. This Sickbay is designed and equipped to keep you healthy and whole. If you catch some unknown space disease, I will do my damnedest to find a cure. If you are injured in the line of duty, it will be my priority and my honor to heal your body and return you to the best shape medically possible. But if you think that I am going to let you get away with clogging up my Sickbay, wasting my valuable time and the valuable time of my staff you have got another think coming! Sickbay is for those crewmembers who need it. Anyone who comes in here with a frivolous complaint can expect to be written up. Do I make myself clear?”

“Yes, Sir!”

“So, if whatever really brought you in here this morning is not a medical emergency, I suggest you leave right now, understood?”

“Yes, Sir!”

“And one more thing, for the sake of your fellow crewmembers, spread the word that the next person who shows their face in here had better be dying, you got me?”

“Yes, Sir!”

“Dismissed.” And he turns, walks into his office and slams a file on his desk loudly as his door slides closed.

Two minutes later he emerges from his office, sipping a cup of coffee. He is greeted by a round of applause. “Nobody stayed?”

“No, doctor.”

“Anyone have any idea what that was all about?”

“I heard something about a bet going around to see which department is able to get enough of a look at Zoe to describe her to the others.”, one nurse says.

“I thought it might be something like that but I didn’t want to believe it. What, are we all suddenly twelve years old? I trust that all of you are above this sort of thing.” And they know it is not a question. “Oh and thank you to whoever thought to draw the privacy curtain this morning.”

“Alright, back to work everyone. I’m going to the bridge to let our Captain know he needs to get his people under control. I won’t be long.”

10:00 –

Dr. McCoy returns to Sickbay to continue his research. Zoe sleeps most of the day, REM sleep by the look of it. Between his reluctance to leave the computer and a couple of legitimate patients, he is only able to see her a few times. Each time he stops in he brings something warm for her to drink in case she’s awake. Each time she seems to sense when he is near and wake herself.

18:00 –

Wrapping up his research and experimentation for the evening, Dr. McCoy contacts the bridge and requests Mr. Spock’s assistance in Sickbay at his earliest convenience.

“Is everything alright?”, the Captain asks.

“Yes, Captain. I just need Spock’s help to communicate with Zoe. I want to be sure there is no misunderstanding.”

“He’ll be right there.”

Thank you, Captain.”

Spock arrives a few minutes later and Dr. McCoy calls him aside. “Spock, before we go talk to Zoe, I need to ask you something. Is there anything that you learned about her during the mind meld that would suggest a fear of injections?”

“Not particularly.” Spock pauses and thinks back. “Oh, there was an incident when she was about eleven that traumatized her. She became ill and and was treated impatiently, if not unkindly for several weeks by the royal medical staff assigned to care for her. As a result, she has little trust or tolerance for the profession.”

“Well, that explains a lot.”

“I gather you have a reason for asking.”

“She needs a shot. I’ve been able to formulate two compounds containing the medicines, nutrients and minerals that her body needs most and has been lacking. One can be administered intravenously but the other must be injected into muscle – there is no other way – and regrettably it will be unpleasant.”

“I see your dilemma.”

“Spock, you’re a man of logic. What do I do? The only way she wouldn’t feel anything is if she were anesthetized, but that’s so extreme. On the other hand, she is only beginning to trust me – there are only one or two nurses that she will allow anywhere near her – what will this do to that trust?”

“Dr. McCoy, I believe you are overanalyzing the situation. Zoe trusts you because you have been consistently gentle, patient and kind with her. Even before we knew she deserved it. She is an intelligent woman, she knows the difference between necessary medical treatment and abuse. Explain the situation to her and I am confident that she will be co-operative.”

“That sounds good, Spock, and if she were healthy and in her right mind I would agree with you, but physically she is so weak and mentally so fragile. She is still angry with us for not helping her to die. I’m not sure she wouldn’t prefer death to any more pain right now.”

“So, what happens without this treatment?”

“Based on what we have learned about her physiology and seen of her regenerative powers, my guess is she would most likely eventually recover. But it would be a slower and less complete process. And, as you well know, this is not a medical ship. We are not designed for long-term rehabilitative care.”

“Pardon me, Doctor, but when we brought Zoe onto this ship – against her will – and kept her alive – also against her will – we logically and ethically committed ourselves to care for her until she is restored to mental and physical health, however long that takes.”

“No argument there, Spock. But this treatment will accelerate her physical healing dramatically. I believe it is best for her to have it.”

“Agreed. I will follow your lead, Doctor.”

Doctor McCoy has assembled some items on a tray. He hands these to a nurse and the three of them approach Zoe’s bed. She startles when she sees them, and this time she remains unnerved as she watches the nurse put the tray down on the table at the end of her bed. She reluctantly turns her attention to Dr. McCoy as he begins to speak.

“Zoe, I need to talk to you, and I’ve asked Mr. Spock to translate so that I can be sure you understand.”

Spock translates this to an obviously suspicious Zoe.

“Our computer has finished evaluating your data. I have put that information together with all the other data we have collected so far. Your blood work and bioreadings have been analyzed and compared to what they should be.” He pauses and lets Spock speak.

“We have identified a number of minerals and nutrients that your system needs but is lacking. My nurse is going to add some of these to your i.v. now.”

As Spock translates this Zoe watches the nurse take one of the syringes from the tray. She injects the contents into her drip and then adjusts the rate of flow.

“We’re going to let these go in slowly so that you can tolerate them better. But they are going to do a lot to make you stronger. Do you understand?”

When Spock is finished translating she gives a noncommittal shrug and nod. She doesn’t have the strength to resist nor does she care.

“Good. Now there is another treatment that you need, but this one must be injected into a large muscle.”

As Spock translates she begins to shake her head and press back away from them.

“Zoe, remember I told you I’m your doctor. I know what’s best for you. You need to trust me.”

At this she lifts her hand toward Mr. Spock and shakes it, obviously wanting him to take it. He approaches and sits at the head of her bed, taking her hand in both of his. They begin to communicate telepathically.

_“I do not want your injection. Just leave me alone. I always heal when I am left alone.”_

Dr. McCoy frowns, sighs and shakes his head. “Zoe, that may be so, but it isn’t the best thing for you. In the past you had no choice, but we have here the means to restore you to good health and it would be foolish and wasteful not to take advantage of them.”

_“You are telling me I have a choice now? What if I say no? What if I choose to refuse your treatment?”_

Dr. McCoy looks like he wants to scold her, but he takes a breath and just shakes his head. “Zoe, be reasonable. Why would you refuse? I can understand that you would rather not have a shot. I would rather not have to give you one, but it is the only way to get this medicine into your system. You need it. I don’t want to force you, so I’m asking you to co-operate. Now, please roll onto your left side for me.”

_“Force me? Your Captain promised me that I would not be forced again.”_

At this, Mr. Spock gives Dr. McCoy a look and quietly says, “She is correct.”

“Nurse,” Dr. McCoy speaks calmly and softly, trying to control his temper, “get Dr. Baker up here. Now!”

“Yes, Doctor.” She hurries off.

“Mr. Spock, may I have a word with you outside please?”

Once they are out of earshot Mr. Spock says, “Calm down, Doctor. Try not to take this personally.”

Angrily, “Is that what you think I’m doing?”

“Well is it not?”

Softening a bit, “Okay, maybe I am. But I thought she was beginning to trust me. I thought she understood that I only want what’s best for her.”

“Perhaps she would like some say in deciding what is best for her.” Musing out loud, “The last thing she said was that she wanted to appeal to the Captain. Interesting choice of words…”

At that moment Dr. Baker arrives. They fill him in and Dr. McCoy asks him to go back in with Spock and try to “talk some sense into her and let me know if you get anywhere.”

19:00 –

“Hi, Zoe. Remember me?” He smiles at her as Spock translates.

“Can we talk for a minute?” He waits for a response. She just stares at him but he doesn’t go away, so she finally shrugs and looks at Mr. Spock who sits back down and takes her hand again.

“So, how are you feeling? Still pretty weak I hear?”

She studies him for a long minute.

_“Why am I even here? Why did you people not just leave me where you found me? I would be dead by now and no one would know or care. So you saved my life. Now what? What happens when I get better? Because I will get better. I always do. What possible difference could it make how long it takes?”_

____

____

Spock does his best to keep up with this barrage.

Now it is Dr. Baker’s turn to take his time before speaking. When he does, he says, “That was several questions. Which one would you like me to answer first?”

She sighs, closes her eyes and fights back the tears.

Mr. Spock whispers to Dr. Baker that Zoe’s emotional state is a mixture of anger, confusion, hopelessness, despair and crushing pain. She desperately wants peace and safety but has no idea how to achieve it or even if it is possible.

Dr. Baker moves around to the other side of her bed, pulls up a chair and takes her right hand. He squeezes it lightly and with his other hand begins to stroke her forehead. She opens her eyes again and looks at him questioningly.

He begins to speak, crooning as much as talking. “Zoe, I want you to try to relax.” He pauses after each sentence to allow Spock to translate. “You are safe here.” “There is a reason for everything.” “There is a reason that you are alive right now.” “You don’t have to figure it out right this minute.” “You don’t have to think about anything you don’t want to, okay?” “You don’t know us and you don’t understand us and that scares you.” “That’s okay. You’ll realize soon enough that you have no reason to be afraid of us.” “Your head hurts, doesn’t it?”

She nods.

“And your thoughts are making you sad and confused?”

Surprised nod.

“I can give you something that will help you. Will you swallow a pill for me?”

She gives a little nod and Dr. Baker buzzes for the nurse. He gives her his orders and she returns quickly with two pills and some water.

“This is going to help your head and your heart, okay?”

She nods, swallows the pills and closes her eyes.

He tells her he is going to sit with her and wait until they take effect. For the next twenty minutes they sit there, holding her hands, Dr. Baker occasionally stroking her arm and whispering encouragement. When it looks like she is about to fall asleep, he asks Spock to translate and speaks again, slowly, leaving time for the translation.

“Zoe, I’m going to leave now and let you rest. I’ll be back to see you tomorrow. But before I go I’d like you to know something. Dr. McCoy is a good man. He really cares for you. He is feeling frustrated and hurt that you won't let him help you. I’d like to ask you to reconsider taking the shot. It is your choice, and if you say no, I won't ask again. What do you say?”

Mr. Spock says quietly, “She will allow it. Send him back in here. I will stay with her.”

“Thank you, Zoe. I’ll see you tomorrow.”

A few minutes later Dr. McCoy and the nurse re-enter. Zoe watches as the nurse prepares the syringe. She squeezes Spock’s hand and he tells Dr. McCoy, “She would like you to do it.”

Their eyes meet and he visibly softens. “Are you sure?”

She nods.

”Of course, then.” He moves around to the other side of the bed, takes the hypo from the nurse and dismisses her. Zoe rolls slightly to her left and holds onto Spock’s hand with both of hers. She startles as Dr. McCoy swabs her hip with alcohol.

“Now, this is strong medicine so it must be injected slowly in order not to damage your muscle. I have the syringe programmed for ten seconds. When I tell you to I want you to take a deep breath in. Then when I say ‘now’ release it slowly to a count of ten. Do you understand?”

She is shaking a bit, but she nods.

“Okay then, breathe in…”

She does.

“Now breathe out – slowly.”

She cringes and winces as the injection begins, squeezing Spock’s hand tightly as she tries to exhale steadily. It stings and burns for the full ten seconds, but the pain fades quickly when it’s over. Dr. McCoy strokes her forehead and tells her how brave she was and how much better she is going to soon feel. The strength of the medicine coursing through her body makes her dizzy and queasy. She releases Mr. Spock and sinks into the bed.

They quietly leave her side.

“She took that well.”

“It is interesting. She wants to please you. But you must know, she found it extremely painful.”

“How do you know?”

“Do you forget she was holding my hand?”

“That’s right. Was she angry with me? Does she hate me now?”

“No, not angry.”, he says thoughtfully. “You are not her favorite person at the moment, but I do not believe that will last long. She seems to be having some sort of internal struggle regarding exactly how she does feel about you.”

“What do you mean?”

“It is not entirely clear. They do not seem to be typical human feelings. As a Vulcan, I have no vocabulary for them in my language either. They must be something specific to her Altan side. I am sure that when she comes to some sort of resolution she will inform you.”

21:00 –

As Dr. McCoy is preparing to leave for the night, Captain Kirk stops by. “Spock filled me in. I know you feel better now that you’ve been able to put all your training to work.”

“Is that some kind of jab at me? I can never tell with you.”

“Look at you making puns at your own expense. Well, turnabout’s fair play, after all. So, how is she?”

“We won’t really know until tomorrow. But I’m glad you stopped by. I’ve got to show this to somebody. Come here.”

They walk over and he opens the curtain surrounding the bed where Zoe is still curled up on her left side. Dr. McCoy goes to the right side of the bed and carefully unwraps and unwinds her long hair, spreading it along her back and side.

“Have you ever seen anything like this?”, he whispers.

“Wow! What color is that?”

“Not sure, but wait until you see it in the light. It’s even harder to pin it down then. And you’ve got to feel it. I’ve never felt anything so soft. Just use a very light touch. You’re going to think I’m nuts, but I’m pretty sure it has nerve endings.”

“No way!”, Kirk says as he comes over and runs his fingers through it.

“Is it that hard to believe? I know I read somewhere that cats’ whiskers are like that. I have to get a sample to analyze.” He opens a drawer and removes a pair of surgical scissors. Since she is on her side, he takes the top half of her hair and drapes it over her shoulder, choosing a section underneath where it won't be noticeable. He gently separates a small strand with his fingers and snips. As he does, the two men jump to see Zoe, still deeply unconscious, grimace and lift her hand toward her head. They exchange glances. Dr. McCoy carefully gathers her hair back up, piles it on top of her head and re-wraps it.

“Let’s get out of here, Jim.”

“Now who’s acting like the twelve-year old?”, Jim grins and whispers.

Back in his office again Bones asks, “Hey, speaking of age, how old do you think Zoe is?”

“From what Spock told us, I’d say at least early thirties. Why?”

“I just can’t get a fix on anything about her. Sometimes when she locks eyes on me I see the wisdom of the ancients, and other times I see a clueless child, or a stubborn adolescent, or who knows what.”

“Yeah, she’s a mystery, that’s for sure. Maybe she’ll be here long enough for us to get some answers.”

“I think I’d like that.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, yeah...  
> This is the first time I've put my writing out there...  
> Comments anyone?  
> Thanks :)


	5. Day 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Things are looking up. Zoe gets a way to communicate.

Day 5

07:00 –

The next morning Zoe wakes up as if from a natural sleep. Sickbay is empty this morning so Dr. McCoy pulls the privacy curtain back when he arrives so that he can observe her without disturbing her. She is assessing her condition and seems surprised to discover how much better she feels. She is trying to prop herself up when she hears him approaching and becomes very still once more.

He immediately notices that her eyes are brighter and more focused. He is smiling broadly, tremendously pleased with the improvement he sees. But it isn’t just that. As he gets closer he realizes that she is stunningly beautiful. Is this the same woman they brought aboard less than four days ago?

She watches him approach. He is smiling broadly. “Good morning. It looks like you’re out of the woods.”

She frowns, not understanding the colloquialism.

“Better? Stronger? How is the pain?” He makes grimace and holds up his fingers.

She narrows her eyes at him and rubs her right hip softly.

He nods, “Your bottom is sore, I know. Zoe, I am very sorry about that, but you must admit it has done you good. Forgive me?”

She looks confused.

“You and I – friends?”

She shrugs, but her face softens a bit. She doesn’t understand why he should care or be so pleased, unless perhaps it validates his skill as a doctor. But it seems more genuine than that. Perhaps she could let her guard down with him a little bit. He has treated her kindly for the most part.

As she is thinking, Dr. McCoy has begun his examination. He draws some more blood for comparison. As he removes the splint from her broken foot and begins to manipulate it, he is surprised that it causes no noticeable discomfort. He asks her to try to move it and she does so with ease. Another body scan confirms that her injuries appear to be weeks rather than days old.

The rest of the exam yields similar results. Her skin is healing rapidly. All the swelling has gone down and her bruising has faded considerably. He puts on gloves and removes the bandage covering her head wound. Discarding the tape and gauze, he gently swabs away the dried blood.

“Remarkable!” He shakes his head. The gash that he sutured is completely closed.

“Zoe, you don’t need these sutures anymore. I’m going to remove them now.” He calls for a nurse to bring him the supplies he needs. She joins him at Zoe’s bedside, and he is relieved to see that her presence causes her no distress. She simply tilts her head and closes her eyes and allows the two of them to work silently, clipping, removing and discarding the sutures, all the while exchanging looks of wonder and disbelief.

With that done he says, “Zoe, I would like you to try to sit up again.” He gestures and she nods that she understands.

He hovers but makes no move to assist as she slowly and tentatively lifts herself to an unsupported sitting position. They both seem surprised at her ability to hold herself up. Suddenly she turns a bit and drops her left leg off the bed, bending her knee.

“Whoa, Kitten! Not so fast!” Dr. McCoy laughs and the unfamiliar sound startles her. She searches his face.

Realizing that she does not know how to interpret his enthusiasm he composes himself and says, “I want you to take it slowly. You have more strength, but it is going to take some time to build up your endurance.” Although he realizes that there is no telling how quickly that could happen.

She allows him to return her leg to the bed and adjust the back so that she can remain upright. “I’m going to order you something to eat. I’ll be back shortly.”

Zoe grabs his arm as he turns to go and indicates the i.v. in her foot. It is obvious that she wants it removed.

“Not quite yet. Let’s see how the day goes, okay?”

She makes a motion with her hands to indicate that she wants to read something.

“I’ll see what I can do.”

08:00 –

An ensign arrives with a small tray containing a warm drink and a small bowl of something soft. She notices his jaw drop when he sees her and how hard he is trying not to stare. When he leaves she samples it disinterestedly but is surprised to find the flavor satisfying. She has a few spoonsful, but after the edge is off her hunger she loses interest. She does continue to sip the drink until it is gone.

Meanwhile another ensign has arrived with an electronic reader that allows her to access the ship’s library. He, too, seems to be having trouble looking at her. She concentrates on his demonstration and in no time is able to use of the device. It keeps her occupied for the next couple of hours. She discovers that in some cases she can view two or three translations side by side on the reader. She makes full use of this feature to enhance her grasp of this new Standard language.

She is still engaged in this pursuit when the Captain stops by after breakfast. She sees him come in and talk to Dr. McCoy. She notices them occasionally glancing her way and is curious to see the surprise and satisfaction on his face as he is updated on her progress.

Eventually he approaches her bed, pulls up a chair and sits down. Dr. McCoy was right. It was less obvious from across the room, but now that he is closer he can appreciate the classic lines of her face. He finds himself wishing that her hair was loose so that he could complete the picture.

As they study each other, there is less fear in her eyes but they are suspicious and questioning. After all, this man holds all the power on this ship and she does not have a good read on him yet.

He smiles and says hello. She cannot bring herself to smile back. For so long any sign of pleasure resulted in torture and pain.

‘So, it looks like you have my CMO and XO wrapped around your little finger. Should I be concerned about mutiny?”

His manner is easy, but his words confuse her.

“I’ve brought you something.” He holds out a small keyboard device.

She looks at it but makes no move to take it.

“It’s to help us communicate.”, he says as he places it gently on her lap. “Whatever you want to say, you type”, he gestures with his hands, “and it speaks for you.”

She looks at him and then at the keyboard. She picks it up and studies it for a minute. Then she tentatively pecks out, _“it speaks for me?”_ But upon pushing the button and hearing the unfamiliar, mechanical voice repeating her words, she pushes it roughly off her lap and turns away. She fights them, but a few angry tears manage to escape.

Dr. McCoy calls out, “Captain, a word please?”

Kirk joins him at his desk.

“What did I say about trying to do this on your own? Didn't you learn anything the other night? I see what you’re trying to do, but let’s get Baker down here to help before we go any farther, okay?”

“Of course…”

“We just have to take it slowly and carefully.”

“No, you’re right. I’ll try to be patient. Keep me posted on her progress.”

“Sure thing.”

After calling Dr. Baker, Dr. McCoy returns to Zoe’s bedside. He is surprised to see that she has picked up the keyboard and is studying it. She startles guiltily at his entrance and pushes it away once again.

“Zoe, Dr. Baker would like to come and talk to you. Is it okay to send for him now?”

She gives him a slight nod.

“Good. I’ll let him know. Is there anything else you need?”

She shakes her head.

“Okay then.” He turns to leave, but then turns back. “Zoe, four days ago you came aboard this ship in such bad shape I didn't think you’d survive the night. I look at you now and I can’t believe you’re the same woman. Is this regenerative ability common to all Altans?”

She looks at him, tilts her head and furrows her brow.

“I’m sorry. We’re going to need to figure out a way to communicate if I’m going to ask you more than ‘yes’ or ‘no’ questions.”

She nods. He smiles and leaves.

10:00 –

Dr. Baker arrives and sits down by her bed with a white board and erasable pen. He demonstrates its use and hands it to her. This time she takes it. He notices that she is left-handed.

“The Captain tells me that you didn't want to use the keyboard. Will you tell me why not?”

She prints slowly, _“That is not my voice.”_

“Would you try it again if we could turn the voice off and just read what you type?”

She thinks a minute and then nods.

Dr. Baker picks up the keyboard, makes some adjustments and hands it back to her. “Can we try it now?”

She nods and types, _“What language?”_

He shows her the settings that allow her to type in several languages and have them appear in their original form or be instantly translated to another language. This intrigues her. “For me to understand you, the translation will have to be in Standard, I’m afraid. I understand you speak several languages?”

She nods, still studying the settings on the small device. When she is ready, she types, _“Too many to list. I am not finding them all. Standard is my newest.”_

“You didn’t speak it before now?”

She shakes her head no. _“My mother taught me a little, but it was not her native tongue. She told me that on earth and many other planets it is the language of diplomats and politicians.”_

“You’re a fast learner.”

_“It has kept me alive.”_

“But it hasn’t kept you from suffering.”

Tired tears begin to form again.

“Do you understand that is all over now?”

Typing furiously, _“How can you say that? How do you know? What if they find me again?”_

“The Federation knows about them now. They will be found and stopped.”

Then, _“How do I know you will not turn me over to them? I would rather die than go back! You should have just left me alone!”_

“Listen to me. That is not going to happen. There are people on this ship who would die themselves before they would let those animals come anywhere near you again.”

Dr. McCoy, perhaps, and maybe Mr. Spock, she thinks, but why would anyone else risk anything for her? But she just shakes her head at him and mouths, “Why?’

“Because these are good people. There are good people in the universe. You have been with the worst people for so long, maybe you don’t believe that anymore. But all of us here are determined to prove it to you. Do you understand?”

She just stares at him.

“Zoe, I’m going to let you rest now. We’ll talk more later, okay?”

She nods and hands him the communicator.

“No, you keep that. That’s for you. We have others.”

She seems surprised, but immediately returns her attention to it as he leaves.

Before leaving he checks back in with Dr. McCoy. “Doctor, her physical transformation is nothing short of incredible!”

“It is, isn’t it? Watching her heal reminds me a little bit of Mr. Scott and this ship. He can keep the Enterprise going with spit and bailing wire, but when he has exactly what he needs he can do the impossible. Her body is the same way. Who knows how long it has been having to make do – make up for what it didn't have. All I did was figure out what her body needed and give it to her.”

“How long are you planning to keep her in ICU?”

“Funny you should ask. I plan to move her to a regular bed today. I don’t expect it will be much longer before she doesn’t need to be here at all, physically. Mentally, emotionally, that’s your department.”

12:00 –

Dr. McCoy comes in and introduces two nurses. He tells Zoe that they are going to work with her to get her out of bed and on her feet. At first a few steps is all she can manage, but after they have gone she tries again. And again. By late afternoon she manages to stay on her feet for several minutes. She begins to inspect her surroundings more closely, opening every door and drawer, not sure what she is looking for, but not finding anything interesting. Dr. McCoy notices all this with amusement. She’s a curious little thing, and damned determined, too, he thinks to himself.

They bring her more food and she takes a few swallows, but doesn’t seem to have much of an appetite, even with all the exertion.

17:00 –

When Dr. McCoy finishes his exam that afternoon he informs her that he has decided to remove her i.v.

She finds her communicator and types, _“No more shots?”_

“No more shots,” he promises, “as long as you keep trying to eat the food we give you.”

She lets him know that she would like the catheter removed as well. She is prepared for an argument, but none is forthcoming. True to his word, no sooner has he left than a nurse enters and quickly and efficiently makes short work of her i.v., the bag and the tubing.

Now that the bag is gone she realizes that she has no idea where a bathroom is. Before she can decide what to do about this, Dr. McCoy is back. He asks her to stand up for him. He puts an arm around her waist in order to hold her gown closed as he walks her slowly through Sickbay to a more secluded area in the back. They reach the last bed and he motions for her to sit. He tells her this will be her bed now, until she is ready for a room of her own. Opening the door just beyond it, he reveals a small bathroom. Then he indicates a call button to push if she needs anything. She makes it a point to use the bathroom immediately, determined to succeed without any help.

The feeling of no longer being tethered to the bed is satisfying but also somehow unsettling. She realizes that her “freedom” is only symbolic at this point. She looks at herself in the gown. She takes in her surroundings once more. What happens when she no longer needs to be here? And speaking of “here”, where is she, anyway? What will these people do with her when they have done what they can for her and lose interest?

The sum total of the days efforts catches up with her and the Ensign who brings her supper finds her fast asleep once more. She wakes briefly during the evening when she senses Dr. McCoy and the Captain talking nearby. Finding their presence oddly comforting, she keeps her eyes closed and allows the sound of their voices to lull her back to sleep.


	6. Day 6

Day 6

07:00 –

Zoe is awake early the next morning. The first person she sees is the nurse who is charting her readings. Zoe gets her attention and lets her know that she would like to take a shower. The nurse is surprised at the request, but even more so that Zoe has made an attempt to communicate with her.

“I’ll let the doctor know.”

She knocks on his office door. “Dr. McCoy, Zoe is asking to take a shower.”

“Really? Well, she isn’t strong enough to stand for that long unassisted. Tell you what, take her to the p.t. lab. Use the special walk-in stall with the seat. Take another nurse in with you to help bathe her and have one more wait just outside in case something comes up and you need the help.”

The three nurses waste no time getting Zoe into a wheelchair and into p.t. They take off her gown, handing her towels to cover herself. She seems not to understand what they are for and makes no attempt to use them. The fact that she is completely naked does not seem to concern her. She is oblivious of her own body and the effect it has on others.

The nurses put waterproof coverings over their uniforms and help Zoe get seated. They adjust the water temperature and begin to spray her hair. Her face is transformed with joy and delight as she lifts her arms and enjoys the sensation of the water running over her. She moves her head left and right, reveling in it. She allows the nurses to lift and move her limbs without resistance as they wash her, but that is the only indication that she is even aware of their presence. The sensation of the water on her body has transported her.

When they turn the water off she is disappointed and reluctant to leave, but she complies with their instructions. She allows herself to be dried, making no attempt to help or hinder. Her skin color has transformed. It seems to glow from within. This has the effect of making her scars stand out like some kind of body art. She again makes no move to cover herself but does not resist the clean gown that is placed on her. Once her hair is dried they return her to her bed. She seems to fall immediately into a peaceful sleep. Dr. McCoy is not there when they return so the nurses must wait to share the details of the experience.

08:30 –

Dr. McCoy returns about an hour later. The nurses fill him in. Not wanting to disturb her sleep he decides to check in on Zoe as soon as he takes care of some paperwork that has been sitting on his desk. There is a knock at his office door just as he is getting started.

“Yes. Come in.”

The door opens and Zoe is standing there, keyboard in hand. He can’t hide the shock from his face. For the first time her hair is not piled up on top of her head. It is intricately braided on both sides of her head and down her back, stopping just above her waist. But it’s the color. Why can’t he pin down the color? He never knew there were that many shades of brown, from golden through auburn through chocolate, he could swear he sees purple in there, too. This is crazy, it is all these and more, but it changes as she moves, like her eyes. And her skin, so smooth and creamy - darker than Caucasian, lighter than African – and luminous. Sweet Christmas! All this is registering while – by some miracle – he manages to look her in the eyes and speak.

“Zoe, I didn’t know you were awake. Are you okay? Do you need something?”

_“I am thirsty.”_ , she types and flashes him the communicator.

He thinks about reminding her of her call button, but he isn’t that busy right now, so he just asks, “What would you like?”

_“What are you drinking?”_ , she types, pointing to his cup.

“It’s called coffee. I don’t know if you’d like it.”

_“May I taste?”_

“Sure.”, he answers, handing her his cup.

She holds it under her nose, lets the steam rise, takes a small sip and hands it back.

“Would you like one?”

She nods.

He goes to the wall, presses a few buttons and returns with a cup for her. She exchanges it for the communicator on which she has typed, _“Is there something else I can wear?”_

“Hmm, I guess you don’t need to be wearing a gown anymore, do you? I’ll see if I can find you a pair of scrubs.”

She settles into a chair across from his desk and sips her coffee.

“Oh, you mean now?”

She shrugs.

He presses his intercom. “Nurse?”

“Yes, Dr. McCoy?”

“Would you please see if we have a pair of surgical scrubs that might fit Zoe? And while you’re at it, if you could find some underwear in her size, that would be helpful as well.”

“And what size would that be, doctor?”, comes the amused response.

“Damn it, nurse! How would I know! Regular? Medium? Small? I’m sure you can figure it out.”

“Certainly, doctor. I’ll see what I can do.”

“Thank you.”, he growls. Sometimes he gets no respect. Seeing Zoe still sitting there he asks, “Are you planning to just sit there and watch me work?”

She looks at him a moment then begins to type, _“Well, I cannot spend another waking minute in that bed. It is your own fault, doctor. You made me better, now what are you going to do with me?”_ , and she slides the communicator across the desk.

He reads it, looks at her and raises his eyebrows. What a picture she is, sitting there across from his desk, lips on the edge of her coffee cup. Damn, he’d love to trade places with that cup! He picks up her communicator and walks around his desk looking at it again. Is she being playful? Teasing him? Or is she being challenging? Confrontational? It’s so hard to know. He searches her eyes for a clue. She is giving him nothing. Perhaps it is a simple, honest question. Wouldn’t that be refreshing.

As he continues to approach, she shrinks back and holds out her hand for the communicator. He hands it to her and keeps his eyes on her as she types, _“Forgive me if I offended you. You are a good doctor.”_

That’s it, then. Simple question. “Zoe, I’m not offended. And I’m not going to make you go back to bed. I think I understand. You’re bored. You’re a bright woman. You need something to challenge you, to keep your mind occupied. But I can’t have you walking around my Sickbay in that skimpy gown. People are in and out of here all the time and you are enough of a distraction as it is.”

He opens his office door and looks out to see that the area is clear. “Please go back and wait until the nurse brings you some clothes. Meanwhile I’ll work on finding some things to keep you busy, okay?”

She nods, gets up and taking her coffee cup in one hand and her keyboard in the other, turns to walk back to her bed. He wonders if she is even aware that the back of her gown opens slightly as she walks, or the effect that opening is having on him as he watches her retreating figure. She truly seems completely unaware of her own beauty – or for that matter, her own physical presence. She behaves almost as if she considers herself invisible. He makes a mental note to discuss this with Dr. Baker.

Zoe doesn’t have to wait long for the nurse, who demonstrates how to put on the scrubs. She is no fan of the underwear, although she reluctantly agrees to wear it after the nurse explains that it is customary. She draws the line at the bra, however, finding no justification for such a ridiculous garment, and the nurse can find no argument to convince her.

As soon as she is dressed she heads back out to Dr. McCoy’s office. Since he neglected to close the door behind him she slips in quietly and stands there, startling him.

“Damn it, woman! Don’t do that!”, he barks.

She jumps but doesn’t flinch, continuing to meet his eyes, waiting.

“Forgive me. I shouldn’t have snapped at you.”, he says sincerely, and is rewarded with an actual smile.

He gets up and leads her back outside where two nurses are waiting.

“These nurses would be happy to have your help in the lab. They’ll show you what to do.”

She nods and follows the nurses into the next room.

“Don’t let Dr. Grumpy bother you.”, one of them says. “He’s always like that.”

“Yeah, but that’s the first time I’ve heard him apologize!”, whispers the other.

The work in the lab turns out to be little more than inventory and restocking, but Zoe makes herself useful picking up every task quickly through careful observation. She welcomes the opportunity to familiarize herself with what this ship keeps on hand, wondering about the absence of certain substances that she considers indispensable, determining to ask Dr. McCoy about them later.

When they take a break for lunch she checks in with Dr. McCoy. He suddenly realizes that he hasn’t examined her yet that day. He takes her to a private exam room with a biobed and gives her a thorough once over. Her vitals are steady. She is no longer in any pain. Her wounds have all closed. Her broken bones are all mending. When he asks how she feels she simply says she is tired. She asks Dr. McCoy if she can rest on his couch until the nurses return. He agrees, with the condition that she eats, or at least drinks, a little something.

13:30 –

The nurses return. As they continue to work it amuses her that, because she cannot speak, people often act as if she cannot hear. These two nurses talk, a lot, which allows her insight into their personalities as well as those of others on the ship and humans in general.

They try a few times to involve her in conversations about subjects in which she has no interest – the relative attractiveness of certain men or hairstyles or clothing – but she simply gives them a confused look and they don’t pursue it. So, they are surprised when the work is done and they are leaving the room to see that she has two reference books in her hands.

“Oh, Dr. McCoy doesn’t allow those out of the lab.”, one of them tells her, reaching for them.

Zoe thinks for a moment, then acts as if she is going to hand them over, but instead sprints around the nurses, briefly catching Dr. McCoy’s eyes as she flies past him toward her bed.

“Stop!”, he says, as the first nurse narrowly misses him.

Then seeing the other, “Both of you! What’s this about?”

The first one tells him, “Doctor, Zoe took some books out of the lab. We told her you don’t allow that.”

“Right.”, the second one says. “And what is she going to do with them anyway? It’s not like she could understand them.”

“Oh?, Dr. McCoy asks her. “And why would you say that?”

“Well, she had no idea what we were talking about when we asked for her opinion about simple things like…”

“Fashion.”, supplies the first nurse.

“Right, fashion. And hair, and, you know…”

“Oh, I see. Of course.” His sarcasm is lost on them. “Any problems, other than that?”

“No, Sir.”

“Then I will deal with the books myself. You’re both dismissed”

“Yes, Doctor.”

Dr. McCoy can’t help but grin as he considers how to play this. This woman is a challenge in so many ways, but damn if he isn’t enjoying it! He decides to take a walk down to her bed with something to drink. He wraps up what he was working on and makes them both a cup of tea. Sure enough, as he gets close to her bed, he can see her sitting up, reading one of the books. She doesn’t look guilty or try to hide it, she simply slips a paper in to mark her place before closing it, while keeping her eyes on his the entire time.

“Hi, Zoe. May I sit?”, he asks, indicating the chair.

She nods.

“I brought you some tea.” He offers her a cup.

She finds her keyboard and types, _“Thank you. No coffee?”_ , exchanging it for the cup.

“It’s too late for coffee. It would keep you from sleeping.”

She nods.

“What are you reading?” He puts down the communication device and picks up the book. “Nanomedicine, Volume 1. That’s a classic. There are many more recent works on the subject in the ship’s electronic library.”

_“Yes, but as it is a subject I am new to, I wanted to start with some historical background.”_

“Understandable, although that particular book may give you more history than you bargained for.”

_“I have discovered that already, yes.”_

“You didn’t want to ask my nurses for their suggestions?”

She is at a loss as to how to respond. It is not her place to tell this doctor that she finds these particular nurses shallow and insipid. But, then again, if he is as accomplished as he seems to be, wouldn’t he already know?

Finally she types, _“It did not seem to fall in their area of interest.”_

And now he can’t hold back the laughter anymore. She initially startles at the sound, but quickly finds herself enjoying it very much.

“Oh, Zoe,”, he says when he can catch his breath, “you are quite the diplomat, aren’t you? So, let’s see. You could have left the books in the lab and asked me about taking them to read tomorrow, or you could have given them back to my nurses and come to ask me for them after they left, but instead you chose to just take them and see what happened. Why?”

_“This way I did not have to wait, I did not have to disturb you, and I had at least a guaranteed half hour to read in peace and comfort.”_

“Not if I had allowed them to come and get the books back from you.”

_“It would have surprised me had you allowed that.” ___

____

____

“Really? Why is that?”, he asks, sensing that this conversation has just taken a turn.

She pauses then types, _“Because you understand.”_

“Understand what?”

She blinks back a sudden tear and shakes her head.

“Zoe, tell me. Please?”, he asks more gently. “What do I understand?”

She recovers her composure and takes a deep breath. Brushing the tear away and biting her lip, she types, _“How I feel about being touched. Where and how and why. I have heard you tell the others. And you always let me know what you are going to do before you do it. None of the others do that.”_

As he reads he is once again touched to the core and disarmed by her openness and honesty.

_“So, I would have been surprised had you allowed the nurses to chase me back here and grab the books away from me.”_

“Well, you’re right. I wouldn’t have. But that reminds me, no running in Sickbay, got it?”

She nods. _“I am sorry. And I am sorry that I interrupted your work. I have noticed that displeases you.”_

“That’s okay. I was ready for a break. And it’s suppertime anyway. Are you hungry?”

She thinks for a minute. _“Not really.”_ , she finally types, remembering the looks she has been getting. Tonight, she’d rather avoid seeing anyone.

“Where did you go just now?”, he asks.

_“What do you mean?”_

“You were thinking of something unpleasant. Will you tell me what it was?”

She looks surprised that he noticed. After thinking a minute she types, _“Why do people look at me strangely? Is it my scars?”_

“What do you mean people look at you strangely? Do I look at you strangely?”

_“No. I mean they look away when I look at them, but then I notice them staring when they think I am not looking. Like there is something wrong with me. You do not do it. Mr. Spock does not do it. Everyone else seems to.”_

Thank god she doesn’t know how often I’ve stared at her in her sleep, he thinks.

“Zoe, I’ll tell you what, I’ll try to catch someone doing it and ask them. But there is nothing wrong with you. The only thing I can think of is you are a novelty. Not much changes on a starship from day to day, so that could have something to do with it.” He is ashamed of the insincerity of his words in the face of her honesty, but, God don’t strike him dead for lying, how can he tell her that she is jaw-droppingly, heart-stoppingly, Miss Universe level beautiful, scars and all?

_“I understood it on Alta, because I looked different than everyone else. But here, no two people look the same. But perhaps it is just as you say.”_

There is so much he wants to ask her, so much he wants to know, but it’s getting late. “Try not to let it bother you, okay? I’ll bring you some soup before I leave in case you get hungry, so you don’t have to call for anything. Don’t stay awake too late reading, alright? You put in a full day today. You need your rest.”

She nods.

“And tomorrow, when you’re ready to work, come to my office. There are some things you can do to help me.”

This time he gets a smile with the nod.

Sure enough, when he returns with her soup, he finds she has fallen asleep with the book open. He covers the soup and leaves it on the table by her bed in case she wakes up hungry later, marks her place in the book before closing it and puts it on the table as well, pulls her covers up and allows himself a minute to study her.

He picks up her hand and begins to stroke it with his. He shakes his head. Four years of neglect and abuse, physical and mental torture. Five days ago winding up in his Sickbay with a skull fracture, contusion, massive blood loss, among other things… If he hadn’t been part of it every step of the way he wouldn’t believe it himself. He can’t help but chuckle remembering that her only complaint was that she was tired. “Well, you have every right to be, Kitten.”, he says. “Sweet sleep.”, and he places a soft kiss on her hand before putting it back down by her side.


	7. Day 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which we learn a little about Zoe's home planet.

Day 7

08:00 –

Zoe is awake, dressed and ready to work when Dr. McCoy arrives. A nurse has already checked her and she has eaten a little bit of the soft food that was brought for her breakfast. She waits until she hears the staff disperse to begin their duties before walking to his office.

The door is once again ajar so she slips inside, thankful that she doesn’t have to knock and wait in the open for him to let her in. She wonders if he thought of this or if it is simply a coincidence.

He looks up and before he can speak she slides her communicator across his desk. He reads, _“Good morning, Doctor. What can I do for you?”_

“Good morning to you, too.”, he answers. “I’m not that organized yet. Why don’t you have a seat and read something while I catch up on this paperwork. I’ll have something for you to do shortly.”

She takes a look around his office. She sees the replicator and noticing that he doesn’t have a cup of coffee yet, makes one for both of them and puts his on his desk before settling on his couch with a book on human psychology that she found on one of his shelves.

When he sees the coffee he looks up to thank her, but she hasn’t waited for nor does she seem to need thanks. She is already curled up with her feet beneath her, engrossed in her book. Noticing the title of the book she has chosen he decides it wouldn’t hurt to leave her to it for a while and wait for her to finish or become bored before giving her another task.

When he is finished and has his work planned out for the day, he looks up at her again. She feels his eyes on her face and meets them. He asks her if she would be willing to organize and enter some notes into the computer for him. It isn’t challenging, but it needs to be done. He shows her how. She catches on quickly. He tells her that it doesn’t have to be done all at once. She is free to take breaks to go back to her book, or nap if she needs to. And the remainder of the day becomes a mostly silent dance. When he is at his desk she is on his couch, reading or napping. When he leaves to attend to Sickbay needs or visits to the bridge, she moves to his vacated seat and works at his computer.

At one point she mentions to him her observations from the lab. She wonders why certain chemicals and compounds seem to be missing. He asks her to make a list of the ones she is referring to and they can talk about them later. She opens a file on his computer and begins a list, along with the properties and uses that she is aware of.

That morning as he is returning to his office, she initiates a conversation by handing him the communicator on which she has typed, _“Dr. McCoy, if you are all so kind and humane as you seem to want me to believe, why did you not help me die? Especially after Mr. Spock understood that this was my wish?”_

“Your body didn’t want to die.”

_“Yes, but my mind did.”_

“Perhaps, in the moment. Are you aware that after Mr. Spock shared with us the details of the mind meld we took no more heroic measures to keep you alive? We simply monitored you and made you as comfortable as we could. Your own body – and mind – did the rest. Now, let me ask you a question. If I were to give you the means to do it, would you take your life now?”

She sits back on the couch and closes her eyes. No more pain, no more loneliness, no more guilt… But something inside screams to survive.

_“No.”_ , she finally answers. _“I cannot tell you why not, but no.”_

He wonders if she can sense the immense relief that her answer gives him.

10:30 –

The Captain calls a staff meeting to hear the results of the research he has requested.

The researcher assigned the task begins, “Captain, I have tracked down all available information on Alta. It is exactly as Mr. Spock said, a planetary kingdom with an elderly king and his human wife as queen. They have six sons, the eldest in his 60s now and ready to assume the throne, but the old man is in no hurry to relinquish it. Some of the sons seem to have been influenced by the democratic sensibilities of their step-mother. This has caused some generational tension.

“They are quite advanced and self-sufficient. Isolationist in a way. Peaceful for the most part, although justice is discretionary. The odd thing is, there is no mention of Zoe in any official records. No record of birth, no family images. Although this one – from earth – of her mother, certainly supports her claim.”

The Captain studies a file photo of a beautiful woman with a wistful look on her face.

“You’re right. There is no mistaking the bone structure. And her father?”

Another photo is produced.

“Not as obvious, but believable. How long to reach her planet from here?”, he asks Chekov.

“Four to five days to send a message. Ten to fourteen days to travel, depending on speed and conditions, Sir.”

“An interesting sociological note. Altans are among the most monogamous in the universe. Their affections, once secured, are rarely transferred. Divorce is almost nonexistent. They have no word for it in their vocabulary.”

“But are the marriages happy? Wouldn’t that knowledge encourage men to take advantage of their wives?”

“Paradoxically, no. They do not seem to possess the human traits of selfishness and entitlement. Rather, the stronger the attachment and affection, the harder the man seems to strive to deserve it. This is possibly a major contributor to the advanced nature of their civilization.”

“Lt. Uhura, have we received any communication from the Federation that I haven’t been made aware of yet?”

“No, Sir.”

“In that case, Mr. Sulu, set a course that will take us closer to Alta. I want as much intelligence from that planet as we can gather.”

“Shall we send them a message?”

“Not yet. Just get me closer while we see what else we can learn.”

14:00 –

In Dr. McCoy’s office that afternoon Zoe hands him the dictionary and shows him the definition of compassion: “Compassion (noun), a feeling of deep sympathy and sorrow for another who is stricken by misfortune, accompanied by a strong desire to alleviate the suffering.”

“You’ve been reading the dictionary? Not a bad way to learn…”

She types, _“You have this. My mother had this. Do all humans have this?”_

“I believe so, to some degree. That’s quite a question. I’ve never given it much thought. It might be a good topic to discuss with Dr. Baker.”

Next she shows him the definition of sympathy: “Sympathy (noun), harmony of or an agreement in feeling between persons, or on the part of one person with respect to another.”

_“This word, it is close to an Altan feeling which is independent of sorrow or suffering. In some cases two people share and understand what the other is feeling. It is a connection of, not the body, not the spirit, but the ‘psyche’, I believe you call it?”_

“Okay. What are you trying to say?”

_“I am trying to understand and identify my feelings so that I can articulate them. This is hard to do when there is no matching vocabulary in your language.”_

“I understand your frustration.”

_“You do! You see, not this ‘sympathy’, but its Altan counterpart, we share this, you and I.”_

“What does that mean?”

_“I do not know. I have never experienced it with another before.”_

“What about Rafe?”

_“The connection that Rafe and I had, there was no need for this. What I am able to do with Mr. Spock is similar to a small degree. With Rafe there were no boundaries, there was no – well, very little – separation. We could live inside one another, flowing in and out and through – like water. Though we kept our identities it was easy to forget where one left off and the other began. There was never a struggle to understand one another because somehow we became one another. But my understanding was that this experience was a function of his species.”_

This must be what Spock was referring to the other night, he thinks. “Are we talking about love?”

_“Love? No! If only it were that simple. This connection exists independently of the presence or absence of love for another. The presence of love does not guarantee it, nor does its presence always indicate a love bond. Never mind. Please forgive me for burdening you with something that I do not understand and am not equipped to explain.”_

“It’s not a burden, Zoe. I, well, I’m glad that you share these things with me. I want to understand you – who you are. I’ve never known anyone like you and I find you fascinating and intriguing. The more you tell me, the more I want to know.”

She regards him for a moment as if deciding whether or not she wants to continue.

_“I share things with you that I do not, or would not, share with anyone else on this ship. Do you know why?”_

He thinks about what he would like the answer to be, but then it comes to him. “Because we share this ‘harmony’?”

_“Yes. Because I am not a ‘lab rat’ to you. Some unique specimen to be studied for your sake. And because it fascinates and intrigues me when I share something with you and see in your eyes that I have given words to what you already somehow knew or felt.”_

15:00 -

It has been his habit to share these revelations of hers with Dr. Baker while they are fresh in his mind. As he is away doing just that, Mr. Spock stops by his office, visibly surprised to find Zoe there alone behind his desk.

“I was looking for the Doctor.” Then, “Perhaps a nurse will know when he is expected to return.”

She extends her hand to him. He takes it from the other side of the desk.

_“Truce, Mr. Spock. I am no longer angry.”_

“That is welcome news, Your Majesty.”

The telepathic connection conveys more precisely than words her desire for him not to address her in this manner. As far as she is concerned, she has broken ties with Alta, and despite her blood has no desire for or claim to that title.

_“I need to know something. When we are communicating like this, the voice you hear, is it mine?”_

“Is the voice that you hear mine?”

_“Well, yes.”_

Then it would be logical to assume that I am hearing yours.”

_“Perhaps, but I already knew what your voice sounded like. I heard it before we ever did this.”_

“I see. Then I must admit that, never having heard your voice before, I cannot say with certainty that the one I am hearing now is what you would identify as yours. I can tell you that it is a lovely, pleasant female voice.”

She considers this briefly.

_“Mr. Spock, if you have a moment, may I sing for you?”_

He is surprised by the request, but answers that, yes, he has time.

She takes a long, deep breath, closes her eyes and begins to sing one of her favorite songs in her head. It is a haunting, complex melody, a song of love and loss, and she loses herself completely in it. As the final note fades in her mind she opens her eyes. Mr. Spock is regarding her with a look of transport.

When he finally breaks the silence all he can say is, “That was beautiful.”

Tears fill her eyes as she releases his hand and mouths, “Thank you.”

That evening he relates the experience to the Captain and the others. This serves to make Dr. McCoy even more determined to find a way to restore her vocal chords.


	8. Day 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This is the last chapter of Destiny and Dr. McCoy - Part One, Book One - "One Man's Trash"  
> This story will continue in Book Two - "Getting To Know You"

Day 8 –

This day begins much like the one before. Dr. McCoy keeps Zoe busy in his office, away from curious eyes. She is content to stay there as he comes and goes, tends to the occasional patient, checks on her to make sure she is eating and interact with her briefly every now and again. She seems to fall into the rhythm of the Sickbay easily. Everyone goes about their business almost forgetting that she’s there.

She still tires easily. A few times a day he will return to his office in search of one thing or another to find her asleep on his couch with a book on her lap. For some reason he finds himself deciding to remain at these times, closing the door and working at his desk, enjoying the peaceful nearness of her physical presence.

18:30 –

Dr. McCoy and Zoe are the last two working in Sickbay when a page comes over the intercom.

“Dr. McCoy, Zoe is requested on the bridge. We’re sending an escort.”

“Roger that.”, he answers absently.

“Zoe, you’re wanted on the bridge. An Ensign is on his way to escort you. Here, throw this lab coat on over your scrubs.”

She looks at him questioningly.

“They didn't say why and I didn’t think to ask. But I think you’ll find it interesting to see at the very least.”, he says, smiling reassuringly.

An Ensign arrives to escort her about ten minutes later. As they arrive and the door leading onto the bridge slides open, Zoe hears the Captain finishing up a conversation with someone she can’t see.

“Right away. Yes, Sir. I’ll make sure she understands. Aye aye, Sir.” He turns to see them waiting and dismisses the Ensign.

“Zoe, come stand here by me.”

She walks to the center of the large circular area to stand to the right of his chair. Its resemblance to a throne does not escape her notice. He gives her a moment to take in her surroundings, the 180 degree view, the bustling activity as half a dozen or so crew members go about their duties.

“That’s right, this would be your first time up here, wouldn’t it? Forgive my negligence.”

She looks at him questioningly.

He studies her a moment, trying to decide what to say. “Damn, I wish Spock was back. I’m just not sure how much you understand. But this can’t wait, and they say a picture is worth 1,000 words…” He pushes a button and speaks into a transmitter, “Go ahead and broadcast the live feed for me, please.”

Suddenly in the air in front of Zoe appears the face of her abductor and chief tormentor.

“Zoe, is this…”, the Captain begins, and he turns to her, but she is no longer beside him. The moment the picture materialized she collapsed to the floor, shaking and scrambling to get away. She half-ran, half-crawled to the turbolift, bumping into numerous things in her path. She is so quick that the Captain is barely out of his chair as the door closes behind her.

He is alive!, she thinks in panic. And now he knows she is alive! And she is trapped on this ship. Why did they have to keep her alive? She cannot let them find her. She will not let them have her. Where can she go? What can she do?

She finds herself bursting back into Sickbay – the only place on the ship that is familiar to her. Dr. McCoy sees her ashen face and the terror in her eyes as she enters his office.

“Zoe! What’s wrong?”

She grabs the communicator from off his desk where she left it – _“Hide me or kill me now!”_ She grips her arm as he reads and mouths, “Hurry!”

Before he can react, the Captain’s voice is heard over the intercom. “Dr. McCoy is Zoe with you?”

Her eyes wild with fear, she shakes her head ‘no’ violently as he instinctively responds, “Yes, Sir.”

“Thank god. Don’t let her leave. I’ll be right there.”

But Zoe is already backing away, shaking her head and holding her hand out to Dr. McCoy in a ‘stop’ gesture.

“Zoe, calm down. Breathe. Whatever this is we’ll figure it out.” He continues to approach as she backs toward the door.

Then she spots it – his phaser. Before he has time to react she has it in her hand, pointed at him. Now he stops, hands up. He doesn’t believe for one second that she would shoot him, but the degree of her desperation finally registers.

“Okay, Zoe. I got it.”, he says softly.

Her back is to the outer door, at last! She presses the button and it slides open. In a wink she is on the other side and it is closing again.

As he starts to sprint to the door the last thing he sees is Zoe raising the phaser to her head and pulling the trigger.

“NO!!!”, he screams as he pounds the button to get the door to open again.

“Forgive me.”, Zoe thinks as she pulls the trigger. Nothing happens! Stupid, useless weapon! She throws it on the ground and takes off running.

McCoy is out the door as soon as it opens enough to let him through, prepared for the worst. His knees buckle with relief when he spots the dropped phaser. He picks it up. The safety is still on. He gets to his feet but before he can pick a direction to head off in, Kirk is there.

“Where’s Zoe? I told you not to let her leave!”

“Yes, and she heard you and was out of here before I knew what happened! I still don’t know but it has to wait. She left here bent on killing herself. You’ve got to order Mr. Scott to lock down the ship and alarm all possible doors, now!”

“Alright, Bones, I can see you’re upset, but I think that’s over-reacting.”

“Oh, you do, do you? Well look at this!” And he shoves the communicator with Zoe’s last plea still on it in his face.

“And the last thing I saw before she disappeared was her holding my phaser to her head and pulling the trigger!”

Kirk pales and whispers, “Oh, dear god…”

“Thank heaven she didn’t know to check the safety! Thank heaven the safety was on!”

“I’ll go see Scotty now. Alert Spock and Baker that when I’m done there I want to meet in my cabin. Don’t worry, Bones, we’ll find her before anything happens.”

19:30 –

Mr. Spock, Dr. Baker and Dr. McCoy are already gathered when Captain Kirk returns.

“Alright, gentlemen, give me a moment to make an announcement and then we’ll discuss this in more detail.” He pages the bridge. “Lt. Uhura, patch me through to the entire ship.”

“Aye, Sir.”

“Enterprise, this is the Captain speaking. As of this moment we are on yellow alert lockdown. Everyone will need their i.d. badges as well as their fingerprints to open all doors. We have a passenger who esc…, um, who is missing from Sickbay. She needs to be found quickly. She is 1.8 meters tall, weighs 55 kg., dark hair, medium complexion, humanoid. Last seen wearing scrubs and a lab coat. If spotted, do not approach. Immediately contact me…” Dr. McCoy grabs his arm and glares at him. “Correction. Immediately contact Dr. McCoy as to her location. This announcement will be repeated every 12 hours until she is located. Kirk out.”

“Spock, Baker, has Bones filled you in?”

“All he said was that you paged Zoe to the bridge and she was back 15 minutes later begging him to hide or kill her?”, Baker says.

“As you know, we sent all the information that Zoe gave us to the Federation. They made it a priority to stop these pirates and today, in a coordinated effort they managed to capture them all.”

“That’s fantastic!”, Baker exclaims.

“It is.”, Kirk agrees. “It was no small feat either. When it was done, I was contacted by Starfleet Command. They had one ‘t’ left to cross before they could all be locked up for good.”

“Oh, god no. Tell me you didn’t.”, Bones groans into his hands.

“All they wanted was visual confirmation.”, Kirk answers. “Just a simple eyewitness identification.”

“Jim, you know her history.” Bones is glaring at him now. “There is nothing simple about this. But that doesn’t explain the extreme reaction. Surely you explained all that to her first?” He looks at Spock.

Spock is looking down. “I was unavoidably detained.”

“I had expected Mr. Spock to be back on the bridge by the time Zoe arrived.”

“Don’t tell me,”, Bones continues, “I’ll bet our Communications Officer – the other person on the bridge who might have been able to help was AWOL, too?”

“Excuse me, Doctor, but both Lt. Uhura and I **had** leave to be absent.”

Baker’s head drops into his hands and he groans.

McCoy is on his feet. Ignoring Spock he unleashes his fury on Kirk. “What the hell is wrong with you, Jim! If anything happens to her I’ll never forgive you, do you hear me? I mean it!”

“The communication was coming from a prison transport. It had to be done immediately.”

“And you couldn’t wait for Spock, or call me or Dr. Baker to join you? Hell, you didn’t even check to see if she had her communicator – which it turns out she left behind!”

“Alright, Bones. I get it! I f***ed up! Royally. But take a breath, would you? You’ve barely known this woman for a week. Where is this coming from?”

Dr. McCoy walks over to Kirk’s liquor cabinet and pours himself a shot. Is that a fair question, he wonders? He puts his elbows on the counter, drops his head and thinks about it.

Professionally, his last week has been consumed with, first, trying to keep this one patient alive, then being rewarded with a recovery beyond his expectations. To lose it all now…

Personally, when he stopped to think about it, and this is the first time he has had time to, he feels like he has found a friend. Someone who not only sees to the core of who he is, even when he is trying to hide it, but someone who makes him feel comfortable with himself as well.

And physically, well, damn, he just cannot get enough of looking at her.

Knowing it isn’t going to make him feel any better, he pours the drink down the drain.

To sum it up, “I’m just not ready to lose her, Jim.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading.  
> Promise not to leave you hanging for long :)

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading!  
> In Part Two - "Getting to Know You", we will learn more about Zoe, emotionally, mentally and physically.
> 
> For anyone not familiar with the quote used in the title of Part One, the full quotation is, "One man's trash is another man's treasure."


End file.
